Eagle and Dove; Germany x Reader

Chapter 14 - A Double Sided Coin

Chapter 14

Ludwig and Gilbert had headed out today for preparations for the funeral. It was weird considering they decided to do it the next day, though the funeral wasn't going to be until February.

You couldn't ask for a better time. The curiosity to know what Iris and Thorn had been talking about was eating you alive.

This time you bring a flashlight and a wet towel to see if you had left any blood on the ladder in the passage. You didn't. So leaving the flashlight and towel at the top of the passage, you brought the camera and wore your gloves as you entered Ludwig's and Gilbert's room for what you hoped to be the last time.

Hurrying over to the safe, you type in the password you had seen Ludwig type. Much to your relief it opens. There is just a small stack of papers and a book wrapped in leather.

Pulling out the papers first, you take pictures not paying much attention to the words.

You shuffle them away, getting comfortable you open up the journal. You had some time. Ludwig and Gilbert said they wouldn't be back until around dinner and it was still before lunch.

You decide to start with the most recent entry which was from last night; he had even marked the time down to the second. Alright.

Dear Diary,

Today must have been one of the scariest days of my life. I've been used to attacks on my life by now, but this time Y/N was with me. It was a taxi driver this time that had driven his taxi with Y/N and I into the (name) river. He had jumped out and the seatbelts were rigged to keep us locked in. I recall sawing away as Y/N just sat there in a daze.

When we had finally hit the water, Y/N begged me to escape and leave her behind. The water had quickly enveloped her and as we sunk further down it was obvious she was barely conscious. And then she was just gone.

I managed to slip her out and escape through the door the driver had left open. But she stayed unconscious coughing water here and there. I screamed her name and shook her but she didn't react.

Now I know I shouldn't have done this but I was desperate. So I kissed her, she woke up and shoved me away. I was so glad I did it again, this time she didn't shove me away and I ended up breaking it in confusion.

I really wonder if she loves me or if I really love her. Or maybe if I'm lucky, both.

Father had passed today, but later she turned away my touch and instead gave Gilbert a hug and he broke down in her arms.

She quickly returned to her normal self, but because I felt jealousy that does mean I have feelings right?

She acts different sometimes, but I guess I can't talk. I shut her out sometimes as well. She must have her reasons.

Like I do.

P/S. There was news about the spy, some very surprising news. I don't feel like writing it down though, I will remember it. Especially since I was so out of it Y/N got concerned.

~Ludwig Beilschmidt

You skipped all the way back to the day before Ludwig had met you. Overall it went a little something like this:

Dear Diary,

I am now on the train heading away from (name) city. It is the middle of the night and we had just boarded. I will reach my home town tomorrow afternoon, so will news of the battle currently raging. Father decided to inform me of a party that will be thrown for Gilbert and I.