Beyond Desire

33-A terrorist, that's what he was, a blue-eyed terrorist.

By the time I finally closed my laptop, my eyes felt like they were burning from the inside out. I was so exhausted I could have sworn I had been reading all night if there weren't clocks to prove otherwise, but it was only a few minutes past eleven. The house was still quiet, which meant my parents hadn't returned yet.

Hours of reading had given me nothing solid to hold on to, just fragments, patterns, and fear concealed as information. Everything felt clear, yet somehow still out of reach.

I leaned back against my pillows, staring at the ceiling, as exhaustion pressed deeper into my bones. But despite the fatigue, my brain refused to slow down, cycling through names, headlines, half-formed conclusions that went nowhere. Whatever I was chasing felt deliberately designed to stay one step ahead of me.

For a moment, I considered calling Faiza, my assistant, but when I remembered the time, I decided against it. I chose sleep instead, or at least tried to. The second I shut my eyes, a knock sounded at my door.

I grumbled, annoyance crawling up my spine as I muttered a soft, "Come in," hoping whoever it was would take the hint and leave me alone.

The door opened just enough for Mahir's head to appear, He looked at me for a second, then smiled in that irritating way of his.

"Your boyfriend is still outside."

"What boyfriend?" I frowned.

He tilted his head, pretending to think. "Tall, calm, rides horses, brings you flowers far too often for innocent motives. Ring any bell?"

I groaned and dropped my head back against the pillow. "I don't have a boyfriend."

He hummed like he believed me. Then opened his big mouth and ruined it immediately. "Well, the way he's been lurking outside like a man who missed his curfew says otherwise."

I shot him a glare. "Do not describe him like that."

"So you do know which boyfriend I mean."

I grabbed the nearest pillow and threw it at him. He caught it without even looking.

The traitor!

"Also, he's been out there long enough for me to start asking questions." He puffed his chest to prove his point. As if that could be of concern to me. I scoffed.

"And why would you ask questions?"

"Because you don't usually storm into the house like a dramatic soap opera character while leaving a man, stranded in the parking lot."

"I didn't storm."

"You definitely stormed." He sounded so serious, like someone defending their favorite team after a last-minute loss. "There was speed and there was equally purpose in those strides of yours."

I swung my legs off the bed, getting ready to step out. "He is really out there?" I inquired, just to make sure.

"Very much so. Looking at the house like it personally offended him."

"Why didn't you tell me earlier?" I couldn't bring myself to imagine how long he had to wait there.

"I did." he calmly stated. I raised a brow at him, a mix of disbelief and suspicion in my gaze. Had Khalid really been standing out there all this time while I was lost in my research?. "I told you....just now," he added, as if that somehow made everything perfectly reasonable.

"You are unbelievable."

"And yet, here we are." He pointed between us. "Siblings."

I hissed under my breath, frustration bubbling up as I pulled myself off the bed. My limbs protested with every movement, hours of sitting on the hard surface of my reading chair finally catching up to me. But I forced myself to stand as I gathered my loose hair and wrapped my veil around it. The fabric slipped slightly at first, then I tugged it into place, smoothing the folds with a sharp tug, as if the very act of covering myself could steady the storm of thoughts racing through my mind.