Beyond Desire

46- The post-trauma bonding mood.

If I were to make a list of the most cherished moments of my life, moments I spent with Khalid would have made it to the list. Two months ago, if you had told me the same thing, I would've looked you dead in the eye and directed you to a mental hospital because clearly, something was wrong with you.

But here we were, somehow spending time together and actually wishing it wouldn't end. However nighttime came, and we both knew I had to return home.

The drive back was strangely normal for two people who had spent the evening discussing attempted kidnapping, and financial crimes.

The entire city had somehow gone quiet, which was unusual for Abuja. The roads were less busy as streetlights stretched across the windshield in long amber streaks. Khalid drove with one hand resting loosely on the steering wheel, and the other against the door.

I had discovered something unfortunate about myself tonight. Near-death experiences apparently made me even more chatty than usual.

"...so the lecturer looked at my assignment, proceeded to sigh for a full five seconds, and then asked me, 'Who taught you how to reference like this?'"

Khalid glanced at me briefly. "A very valid question actually."

I ignored the fact that he was supporting one of the lecturers who tormented my life in law school. "That grown man even took off his glasses, you will think he was about to deliver some heartbreaking news, only for him to say, 'You should be embarrassed by your bibliography.' Then he went on to ask me if I had actually finished university."

Khalid's shoulders moved slightly as he chuckled.

"Oh, you find my misery funny?"

While still struggling to keep the laugh tucked in, he mumbled "Not at all."

I squinted my eyes at him. "You laughed, I saw you."

"I didn't."

"You did."

"I just exhaled."

"That was not an exhale. You asked me to tell you the most embarrassing moment of my life. I did, and your response was to laugh at me. Very good."

"Come on, references aren't done that way, he had every reason to ask if you finished university."

"I beg your pardon?" I adjusted the AC vent so the cold air stopped hitting my face directly. "I was running on three hours of sleep, an accident was bound to happen. It was just a mistake."

"Well, you created those mistakes."

"Such a wild accusation."

He switched off the Ac unit completely. "You argued with that same man over font size, correct?"

"That's because he was actually wrong."

"You also told him Times New Roman was a colonial construct."

I straightened up. "And I still stand by that."

This time around, he actually laughed openly. "See, you embarrassed him twice, he was just taking his revenge."

I rolled my eyes dramatically. "Continue laughing."

"Sorry." He laughed again.

Something occurred to me and I blurted it out. "You know...this might be the first real laugh I have heard from you."

"Congratulations, I guess."

"Can you laugh again?" I was being silly, I know but I couldn't help myself. He had such an angelic laugh.