Privacy [completed]

TWELVE| hair is love?

The plane ride was dreadfully long even though it was just a few hours. I didn't go to freshman orientation due to a sudden anxiety attack about being in a huge group of desperate, cocky teenagers. So I simply went online and took the virtual tour. It's weird to be here in California. Everywhere is hot and sunny and I doubt it'll ever get any warmer.

I've lived in Aspen, Colorado almost my entire life, so it's weird changing everything. Your clothes, the way you wear your hair, the way you drive, everything's changing. I remember thinking it was a good thing to have change. But when I arrived, I felt as if it was the worse decision of my life.

"You brought so much shit," groaned Chloe.

"Not in front of Siena!" Mom growled at Chloe.

My suitemate, Siena, is on the volleyball team too. She is a junior. The only reason I was allowed to stay at a suit is because of my doctors note. She got a scholarship just like I did, but she's obviously been varsity for much longer. I wonder how she's doing?

"My parents literally say the same thing about me, saying I have too much crap," Siena spoke.

Siena was called by one of our other suitemates, there are four, so she walked out. Mom finished tucking the sheets into my bed and rolled her eyes.

"She's lovely."

"Oh relax, you don't have to live with the girl," Chloe rolled her eyes. "It'll be interesting to see how my big sis will live with another person."

"Chloe!" Mom scolded.

"She's going to have to care for a chronically depressed, eighteen-year-old freshman with blue hair," Chloe joked.

"Goodbye," I groaned.

"I don't get a hug from my sissy?" Chloe asked sticking her bottom lip out and opening her arms.

I huffed and hugged my younger sister. She hugged me back just as awkwardly. That was the only time we've ever hugged. When we broke apart, Mom gave me a hug as well, just as awkward. I hate people touching me, even till this day.

When I told them both goodbye, Mom began crying. I sat on my bed quietly waiting for them to leave. When they did, Siena walked back into the room.

"Wanna go down to the gym and hit some two's?" she asked.

I looked at her with my head tilted to the side.

"Let's go play volleyball," chuckled Siena. "It's time for practice soon anyways."

Siena left without me as I searched for my spandex and a t-shirt. I didn't mind her leaving, nor did I mind getting lost on the way there alone. I didn't remember a thing from the virtual tour, nor did I care. I felt tired, but I'm here for change and volleyball, I might as well play the part. I remember trying to convince myself of that for so long.

I remember getting a call from Megan around this time. A call that started everything and ruined everything. A call that not only made me feel naked, but also alone.

"I told you to stay away from him!" She yelled as soon as I had answered.

"From who?" I asked.

"Don't you act all confused on me you piece of shit!" Megan yelled.

I was silent. She'll tell me when she wants.

"Harry fucking Styles! He told the entire world about you!" Megan yelled.

I gulped.

"You just don't listen, do you? Stay away from him!" Megan yelled.

I frowned.

"You're so fucking whipped, you slut! He has you right under his fucking wing- those birds with eyebrows on his chest. He has you right under their wings!" Megan yelled.

I had continued to frown.

"You mute fucking bitch! See you in a week for a friendly game of volleyball," Megan growled and hung up.

I sighed. I knew it was too good to be true. I knew we could never be friends. I'm so stupid, I always do something wrong! It's so annoying! I wish I wouldn't be so imperfect. I remember beating myself up about it, even till this day.

When I walked into the gym, all the girls standing by the net talking. They were all in shape, most of them tall with only two shorter players. I stood in the corner away from the talking. One of them must've noticed me since it became silent.

A girl asked my name. "Yes," I answered.

"You're Harry Styles girlfriend, aren't you?" Another one asked.

I shook my head no.

"Whatever you say. You're so into him," another one snickered.

I had frowned. It's always too much to defend yourself when everyone else is against you. I heard a whistle blow and two women walked in, our coaches. We stood on the ten foot line of the court and introduced ourselves. I hate doing this.

Anxiety crept up my bones as we went around saying our names. I kept fidgeting, feeling much too uncomfortable to be the center of attention even if it was for a second.

When my turn came around, I mumbled my name. A few rude chuckles erupted the gym. My head went down further.

"Say something interested about yourself," ordered the coach. "Your year, your major, any special talents?"

I thought and thought. Nothing's really interesting about me other than I play volleyball and soccer. I'm not too good at coursework so I'm not majored in anything, I can't do anything talented so I'm a failure in hobbies.

"Freshman," I mumbled quickly.

"Anything else?" She asked, her tone seemed impatient.

"I play soccer too," I mumbled quickly.

"So does half the other girls on this team," said the blonde coach.

I bit my lip. I thought I was pretty special being a soccer and a volleyball player, but I guess not. I remember that hurting my feelings much more than it should've.

"We're going to have to dye that blue hair," said Coach.

A few girls 'oohed' while my head raised up. I cocked an eyebrow at her.

"We represent UCLA, not a tattoo parlor!"

"I don't have any tattoos," I mumbled.

I've had this blue hair ever since I was thirteen. It's always been apart of me. Sometimes people at High School didn't remember my name, so I was known as The Girl With Blue Hair or Blue Girl. I carry that same title today, but in a way I don't like. But my hair, it keeps me connected with my friends who have gone. It keeps me sane.

"I won't change my hair," I muttered, eyes to the ground.

Suddenly, Coach had grabbed my jaw with her hand and squeezed it, making me bite my own tongue and wince. "Take four laps around the court, stay outside the black. I don't deal with attitude!" Coach yelled.

When she let go, I took off. I'm not much of a runner. I wish I was. By half of the first lap I was exhausted. Maybe I should've eaten something today, I always miss a meal.

"With that pace, you'll never get in the game no matter how good you are! Run!" Coach yelled. "Run like I'm gonna dye that blue hair of yours!"

"It's hideous anyways," a girl muttered.

"She's too fat to be on the team," another laughed.

I kept running.