Addiction

Blue Is Not Your Color

Blue Is Not Your Color

"Twice I turned my back on you
I fell flat on my face but didn't lose
Was it the blue night
Gone fragile
Was it above the man
In a wonder steady going under."
-Lead You On, Machine Gun Kelly

~*~

You know when you have one of those days where everything just goes so fucking wrong and as soon as your head hits that pillow at night, those tears sting your eyes and you have no other choice but to cry, so you do just that, you cry. You cry so hard, you don't know how you'll ever stop. But, it's okay because every strong barrier cracks, but never crumbles.

"I feel like shit." I whine on Colson's chest.

"Are you on your period?" Colson queries. 

"No, Colson, I am not on my period." I breathe a laugh. I sit up and cross my legs. Looking back at Colson he has his eyes closed and a smirk taking over his lips. "Maybe I only feel like shit because some idiot left the window open last night when it was snowing and we almost froze half to death."

"I wonder who that idiot was." He chuckles. I hit him in the face with a pillow and his eyes open glowing with humor. "I draw you a bath, make you hot chocolate, and warm you up for two hours and that's how you repay me?"

"You wouldn't have had to do all that if you hadn't left the window open and actually, I was warm after an hour. That second hour was for my own pleasure." I confess.

Colson shakes his head and chuckles. I watch as he gets up from his spot on his bed and pulls on his shoes. He turns to look at me from the edge of my bed and I look back. For a minute, we just stare at each other and he leans back to cup the side of my face with his hand. 

"I'll close the window when I leave." 

"You should've done that when you came in last night." I scold.

"That will be the first and last time." 

"Promise?" I stick out my pinky.

"Promise." He hooks his pinky with mine. I smile at him as he gets up and opens the window. We hold eye contact as he closes the window behind him. Once, he takes off down the street, I pull out my phone to call Kelsey and wrap myself in multiple blankets.

"Hey, what's up?" Kelsey answers.

"Hey, K, are you busy?"

"I am not. Courtney, love, are you okay? You don't sound like my upbeat love bug?" She notices.

"I need to ask a favor." I simply say. 

"Alright okay, what is it?" 

I tell her what happened this morning and then ask my favor. "Take your time on this, too, please. Do what you gotta do first and then swing by with it."

"Okay. Courtney..." She starts.

"Kelsey, it was an honest mistake. It isn't his fault, well it is, but I should've reminded him. It's my fault just as much as it is his."

"Alright, I get it. I'll be there after I go to Tee's house, then I need to run to the store, and I'll... I'll be there." 

"Thanks, Kelsey." 

"No problem, Courtney." The line clicks.

~*~

I haven't left my bed since this morning when Colson carried me to the bath tub full of scorching hot water. Let's just say blue lips is not my color. I feel like absolute shit and I googled my side effects. Turns out ya girl has a fever.