Addiction

Merry Go Round

Merry Go Round

"Knockin' at the door but doesn't get an answer
Bobby's nervous, his heart starts to beat faster
He hasn't talked to his girl in so long
She sold his phone for a hit, damn how he wish that he could hear her laughter
But his drug hit her like a cancer
And he forgot 'cause he had left and cleaned his act up
Passenger seat in his Acura got a picture of 'em kissing
Under the words "happily ever after"
He walks into the house, it's a fuckin' disaster
Every step he takes his shoe crushes a capsule
Holds his breath, he knows what he smells isn't natural
Looks down, it's the body of the queen of his castle
"Baby please, baby please!!!"
"Wake up!!!"
He screams on his knees and he sees her hands around her stomach
Inside was a child
And realizes it was his...
[gun cock, gun shot]
Summer day,
An entire family died on that summer day
'cause a facade made a girl give her love away
But those were Bobby's consequences that he had to pay
Love is pain."
-Merry Go Round, Machine Gun Kelly

~*~

"It was that bad, huh?" I lean my back against Haley's grave. "I told you it was going to be like this, but I thought you were strong enough."

I look up at the blue sky. For it to be winter, it felt like a summer day.

"I don't understand, what was so bad? It would've past with time. I- I'm just so angry, like really fucking angry, Haley!" I look around me to make sure no one notices my yelling at a grave. "For the rest of my life, I won't have you. Do you have any idea how that ruins a person? What were you thinking?"

An angry tear slides down my cheek and I damn there slap myself trying to wipe it away. 

"For fuck's sake, I can't do this. Are you even listening or is this some shit people do to hold on to sanity? I'm sorry, I'm frustrated. You took a lot when you left. You would've been a mother. I can't quite fathom that because you were always a baby to me. My baby sister..."

I get up and dust off my jeans. "I can't do this. I can't talk to you like you're still here. You fucking left me, how could you do that? I wouldn't even been here doing this if you would've just opened up to me instead of that dumbass, Tommy. I'm not ready to sit here and yap it up with you, I can't. I'm talking to your fucking grave! What kinda of shit is that, Haley, huh?"

Silence takes over as I stand there waiting for an answer that will never come.

"Whatever, I'll talk to you later." I brush my fingers across her tombstone as I leave.

~*~

The house is empty when I get home. I guess Colson is still at work, I thought he'd be home by now. Great, yet another thing I have to stress about.

What the fuck is he doing? Where is he? Who is he with?

I pick up the phone to call him, but instead my phone begins to vibrate as my Dad's face pops up on the screen.

"Hey, what's up?" I answer.

"Hey, you okay?"

"Just peachy, how are you?" 

"I've seen better days, but I ain't complaining. Anyways, you ever get in touch with Kelsey?"

"No, what for? I thought she was supposed to be moving in soon." I query.

"She was. A couple days ago, but she never showed. I called but she didn't pick up. So, I called you and told Colson to pass on the news. It must've slipped his mind."

"I bet it did." I roll my eyes. "I'll get in touch with her. If she doesn't answer, I'll go over to her place, see what's going on."

"Alright, let me know."