Get Out of My Pants

Situations that make me uncomfortable

Person: Hey isn't he just so hot? Look at those arms.
Me: Ahh. Oh my goodness, yes. He has an amazing smile too.
Person: I bet he has a nice dick.
Me: *laughs awkwardly* Maybe.
Person: Don't lie you'd bang him.
Me: *internal screaming*

Dumb ass dude: That's so gay.
Me: Gay isn't a synonym for shitty.
Dumb ass: Only gay people say that. You're gay.
Me, blurting out because at that point I was just so upset: I am not gay. I'm asexual.
Dumb ass: So you like split in two? What the fuck shut up.

Person: What's your sexuality?
Me, being oddly open: I'm asexual
Person: Huh?
Me: I don't feel sexual attraction.
Person: Oh that's so sad.
Me: kay ●-●

Parents: Don't have sex.
Kid: I'm asexual
Parents: No no you're not you're just confused you'll want to have sex when you're older sex is great you're too young to make your own choices.

Me: Everyone talks about Netflix and chill that sounds like such a great date.
Friends: Uh. No. Netflix and chill isn't really Netflix and chilling.
Me: *requestions the world and becomes very confused*

Someone: I just look at a person and abruptly have a strong urge to have sex with them. (Not really but you get the point)
Me: Okay.... that sounds totally fake but okay

Being uncomfortable makes me uncomfortable
- Asexual Spaghetti ♡