Strife of Misfortune(Wattys2016)

Weightless

 He was weightless as he cascaded through the dark waters of oblivion. Like a feather he glided, never reaching the bottom. For a moment it felt as though time stopped its hand and trapped him in that place-Leaving him to float in those dark pools.

Emerging from the depths came sensations. They've lingered on his body, caressing his limbs like sweet kisses. A rich scent of vanilla accompanied them. He allowed those perfumes to hypnotized his senses, guiding him into tranquility. That's when a thought invaded his mind. These energies, they felt so familiar but how? The way they hexed his senses beckoned his mind to wonder. Loki searched deep inside himself for the answer, finding none. It was strange that he couldn't notice, especially since the energies matched perfectly with Asta's aura. But how could he notice when he was being dragged into the heart of the place, with each shift stifling his breath.

As if to hinder his thoughts further, the pools gashed at his body, summoning pain to pulverize his senses. A scream tore through the quiet and eradicated whatever tranquility was left in him. There was no end to the brutal assault. Each wave flooded his senses, pulling him farther and farther away from thoughts about the energies. He was completely submerged in those burning waves.

Soon, all thoughts about the energies were erased from his mind. There came another pang of pain and a new thought arose from its flames. Those images dripped with his broken sorrows. He longed for the day where those thoughts no longer hurt him. But just like sticks and stones, they will always hurt him. A sharp pain plunged into his chest, provoking his screams. With each sharp interval he fell deeper and deeper into his thoughts. They were like infections feasting on his brain. But Loki couldn't help but to brood. It was as though he had no control over the matter. Just like that his woes ceased and he was flung into the flying images at full force. His eyes narrowed and sharpen. A new sensation ignited in his veins, anger, it seared his body like boiling water. "Thor..." Loki exhaled, his malice stroking the beast that laid dormant in his mind. "THOR!" He screamed. How dare he push him into this hellhole! Loki thought. Images of the broken bifrost and of his father crowded his mind. They didn't accept him. They just wanted him to fall!

Loki entertained those maddening claims, feeling his anger collapse into crippling pain. He just wanted acceptance. That was all Loki wanted. Was it wrong to desire the same affections Thor received in every waking moment of his life? Was it terrible for Loki to have ambitions? To aspire to sit upon the golden throne and gain his father's respect?! IT WAS ALL HE WANTED! Loki gritted his teeth together, feeling that anger scream inside of him. His father never respected him, never upheld him in high esteem. He was just mere decoration to go unnoticed. Loki released a pitiful chuckle. It was the price Loki had to pay for being the blood of Asgard's sworn enemy.

From the vast emptiness came voices. They chased Loki's ears, falling in and out of focus. "They never truly loved you." Loki froze. Where were those voices coming from? He heard that feeble spark once more. Their voices increased in volume at every return. "They never cared. You were an object to them." Those words stung like a brutal slap to the face. No Longer did he puzzle over their origins, his focus returned to the bitter truth behind their words. He could feel their wisdom pick at his open wounds. "A mere pawn. A vessel for their political dominance."

Those voices buzzed  around him like bees. They twirled faster and faster, entrapping him in a twister of truths and pain. It was that pain that caused his heart-rate to skyrocket through the roof. That pain that sucked up their every word like a sponge, never questioning their credibility. "Let us help you." Came those voices again. They repeated the verses like a mantra.

"You want to help me..." Loki whispered, feeling his mind dissolve to dew. All sense slipped from him like sand rushing through the fingers. He felt himself shift more and more towards their persuasions. But then a sentiment blossomed in his heart. Loki could clearly see those images of him and Thor smiling together in his mind. Everything wasn't always in black and white. As if to yank him back into their play, they set fire to his veins. Loki screamed, burying those thoughts beneath the flames. He watched as they thawed into ashes. In retaliation his mind revived thoughts of his mother. Loki captured the pale blue petals of her eyes and silver gloss raining down her golden hair. His mother. Oh how he missed her in those terrible moments. The way she could kiss his sorrows away and hug him tightly. He longed for that embrace, for that kiss upon his cheek that always made his day. They were gifts for her son. A gift he would never receive again.