Fantasy

Chapter 33

I heard a knock on my door, so I went upstairs to check who it was. I was in my basement. I picked up my pace, as the knocking continued really hard this time, and faster. I opened the door and Matt was standing there.

"Matt what-" he pushed me inside and started hitting me. He punched me in the nose and I'm pretty sure it's broken. He punched my stomach and I couldn't breathe

"AHHHHHH" I screamed as I sat up. My mom came rushing into the room and sat on my bed.

"It was just a dream Beth. Just a dream" she consoled me

"No mom. It really happened" I told her sobbing into her shoulder. She embraced me and kissed the top of my head

"You should talk to him you know" she told me.

"I will"

"Okay sweetie. I'm going to go back to sleep. I love you"

"Love you too mom" I said as she walked out and closed my door. I've been home for five days. And every night I've had this same dream. Because the tour got cancelled, we all went home. But I didn't say goodbye to anyone. The minute they released me to that hell hole they call a hospital, I was on the next flight home. Shae came home with me, but she left after she did. Her and I are on good terms. But I mean, I still have this gut feeling she had something to do with that night. Everyone has been very vague about it, and no one wants to talk about it. But I want to know answers.

I haven't talked to Matt, or Hayes since that day when I woke up. I've talked to cam plenty times though. And a matter of fact, he bought a house in LA, with a couple of the boys. They all pay shared fees and stuff. It's beautiful. They've invited me to come, but I don't really feel like going. I do want to record with the Jacks though, but I'll have to wait a little while. I still get these splitting headaches.

I've gotten so much hate from people who don't even know the real story of what happened. And I don't really either, so I can't defend myself. I haven't been very active on Twitter though. Or Instagram. Hayes has posted and seems to be doing fine with it. Which totally sucks.

Cam says he has been like his normal self, until some one mentions me. Which is really hard according to cam. I felt my phone buzzing so I looked over aT it,  and Gilinsky was calling.

B- Bethany G- Gilinsky

B- hey

G- I'm so sorry to be calling this late.

B- what do you want

G- um Hayes is in a really bad place right now , could you call him,

B- g. He doesn't wanna talk to me.

G- yes he does Beth. He needs you. This is so bad for him. He's not complete without you. Leaving you, took a whole half away from him. You need to call him

B- fine

G- okay thank you

B- no worries

G- love you sista

B- love you too brotha

That's how our phone call went. We are so close that saying I love you, isn't even a big deal. I do love Jack. Not like that though. Like a brother. We have that kind of relationship. I went into my contact list and called Hayes. Realizing  that it's 3am.

B- Beth H- Hayes

H-he-hey Bethany

B- hi Hayes. Are you okay

I heard a lot of sniffles on the other end, and he sounded like he was crying. I started crying and wiped away my tears reminding myself I gotta be strong.

H- no Bethany. I'm not

B- what can I do to help

H- I need you to listen

B-okay

H- Bethany I love you. I always have and I always will. But I can't do this right now. Whatever this is, it's  ruining my life. I think we just need a break from each other. For a short while. Or maybe a long period of time. But I needed to tell you this and let it out. I honestly. I hate to do This. Because you are the most beautiful girl I have ever met. And the best girl I know. But, I think we just- we can't be us anymore. Not right now. We will know when it's time. But I want us to be okay. In public I don't want any fighting and I. I just want to be okay.

I shook my head 'no' as if he could see me. I tried to hide back the water fall that was escaping my eyes.

H- Bethany?

H- Beth I love you

After that I hung up and threw my phone on the ground. I punched my pillow and cried Into it.

"FUCK" I screamed. My heart was just broken. Before it was cracked, now it's in a million pieces.  I curled up with myself and cried. I just cried. I stared at my wall and cried. I couldn't stop crying. Hayes and I aren't a couple anymore, for a reason that I don't even remember. That's so unfair. It doesn't make any sense.

I shut my eyes blocking out the pain. I didn't do this. I didn't do anything to deserve this. I didn't sit In a hospital room getting better, for Hayes to just dump me like a piece of shit. I got up and went into my bathroom.

"Bethany" I said to myself. "You gotta be strong. The stronger you are, the less this hurts. You gotta be a strong woman. Hayes Grier fucked with your feelings. You can get over a boy. Because this is not your fault" I said to myself starting at my reflection.  I look at my stitches, and there was a red/pinky scar.

I turned on the tap and splashed water on my face. I wet it with a towel and steadied my breathing. I curled up in bed and shut my eyes.

I'm stronger than him. I can get through This.