It was dark outside. Marcy hadn't noticed the sun set, even though she'd been gazing out the window when it happened. She had been too caught up in her thoughts to pay much attention to anything else.
Gilby was still there. And Saul, of course. They had pushed the couch over to the wall to make room for them all to lie on the floor together.
Marcy had gone pretty quiet since it was proposed she come on tour. She chimed in on the conversation every now and again but mostly kept her mouth shut.
The carpet was incredibly soft and plush. It was a pretty color too, a sort of golden brown. She had thought it was ugly at first but the longer she looked at the carpet the more it grew on her. It was quite a happy color, she decided. And Marcy very well knew the importance of surrounding yourself with things that make you happy.
She ran her fingers over the carpet lazily. Her eyes were half closed and each blink was slow and drawn out. Marcy felt very warm, like it could've been the middle of summer or something. Her breathing was very deep and steady and her pretty lips curved upwards into the faintest smile.
Heroin turned her into this. She liked to compare it to the feeling she had a few moments before falling asleep at night - except this was better. Her toes would tingle and it was kind of like she was floating and it seemed like none of her problems mattered anymore and she was okay. Everything was going to be alright.
It felt like falling asleep nearly as much as it felt like sex. Whenever her fingertips brushed over the soft carpet a wave of pleasure ran through her body. It was as though every sensation she felt was amplified to the point that it was nearly unbearable. Marcy could only describe the feeling as orgasmic.
Ironically, sex was out of the question when Marcy was experiencing this type of high. She'd tried fucking someone once in this state. It had seemed like such a good idea at the time but turned out to be far too overwhelming to be anything other than awful. Disappointing, really. It'd had so much potential.
There was this new cocktail Marcy had heard about. The guy she'd been talking to had called it 'the five way'; a mix of smack, coke, meth, rohypnol (roofies) and vodka. He said it was the most intense high he'd ever had. Like smack times ten. And apparently he hadn't come back down for days. Marcy had made it her personal goal to try the five way ever since because damn, if there was anything better than heroin she was sure as hell gonna try it.
Marcy dipped back into reality. She wasn't sure if she'd been entirely conscious as a lot of time seemed to have passed since she was last aware. The girl, Lilith stood before everybody, talking with Saul, who hadn't even bother to lift his head.
Her dark hair was pinned back on one side and had been tousled neatly, giving the impression that she'd woken up like that. She wore a tight leather miniskirt and an even tighter crop top, which showed off her smooth, tan stomach. Despite the amount of skin Lilith had on display, she still managed to look classy, rather than cheap.
Even from her spot far away, Marcy was swept over by Lilith's incredible perfume. It smelled sweet, like peaches or something, but there was a hint of vanilla in there too. Marcy resisted the urge to lift her wrist to her nose and see what she smelled like. Probably not anything good. She hadn't showered in the longest time.
"C'mon Slash, I thought you were gonna hang out with me today?" Lilith said in her soft, sensual voice. Persuasive. Irresistible. Perfect. With her pouty burgundy lips and dark eyes, even Marcy would've done anything Lilith asked.
"Sorry, maybe next time." Saul was avoiding eye contact, watching Marcy instead. Perhaps he was trying to convince himself not to ditch her for a groupie who just so happened to look like a goddamn model.
"Seriously dude? You suck," Lilith sighed dramatically. She paused a moment and then giggled. Cute. "Are you sure nothing can change your mind?" Not so cute.
Saul rolled his eyes. Couldn't Lilith see that now definitely wasn't the time for her shit? Nothing could make him leave Marcy. Not even the promise of sex. "I'm busy." He said dismissively. It didn't seem necessary to elaborate.
Lilith screwed up her nose in a sweet sort of way. "Alright, if that's how you're gonna be..." She strode over the room and started sifting through the Saul's record collection, which was piled haphazardly on the coffee table. After a moment she pulled out Megadeth's Countdown to Extinction.
Marcy didn't recognize either the band name or album, it'd been so long since she had heard new music. She knew it'd be good though, Saul had the best taste in music out of everyone she knew (apart from Duff, who'd listened to punk, just like her).
"Good choice." Gibly commented nonchalantly. He didn't seem much bothered whether or not she stayed.
Marcy just frowned at Lilith as she changed the record. She had been perfectly happy listening to Led Zeppelin IV. Nobody had told Lilith she could chose what played next. She acted so... entitled.
Saul pushed himself to his feet, an expression similar to that of Marcy's playing over his features. He held out his hand and helped Marcy up from the ground. A shock of static seemed to rush through her body from where their skin touched. Some things just never change.
Saul didn't want to let go of her, even once she was standing. It was silly really. Childish. He knew she might be gone soon. Marcy wouldn't stay the night if she decided not to come with them on tour. Less than an hour and she could be gone right out of his life again. God, it didn't seem fair at all.
Five years had been completely wasted. Thrown away. Had anything been worth it without her? It was strange that a person could make him feel this way. All this time they could have been falling in love. They could've been happy.
The music was too loud and Lilith and Gilby were dancing too close and Saul couldn't think straight. He needed to get out of there. He needed to talk to Marcy. So he touched his fingers to the small of her back and they disappeared into the bathroom, shutting the door behind themselves. Needless to say, Lilith noticed.
Marcy sat up on the sink counter and gazed at Saul, who leaned with his back against the door. Her pupils were dilated and her eyes were heavy. Her dyed blonde hair was messy and she'd tucked it behind her ears when he hadn't been looking. A faint blush remained from still remained from earlier that afternoon, when they'd been dancing. She seemed so innocent and sweet.
"So," Saul murmured softly after a long moment of quiet. "What are you gonna do?"
She let her lips part and exhaled slowly. Marcy rested her head against the wall and she shut her eyes. She needed to think. Think.
The music from the other room was thudding through the walls. Too loud. Marcy couldn't concentrate on the matter at hand. Her mind kept going back to the girl. Lilith. Her replacement.
She was better than Marcy in every way imaginable and she was more intimate with Saul than Marcy had ever been. It hurt Marcy to think they'd fucked, but she knew it must have happened. She tried not to picture them together. The idea was just awful and her stomach twisted at the thought.
No. It wasn't fair. Five years Marcy had been gone. She wasn't going to let this get in the way of her friendship with Saul or Duff (if she ever decided she wanted to see him again). Marcy wasn't going to let Lilith steal her (former) best friends. She wasn't.
"Okay, fine," Marcy blurted before she could stop herself. "I'll go - I'll go with you tomorrow."
♪♪ Song: All My Love by Led Zeppelin ♪♪
