Bloodlust (The Blood Series #1)

Chapter 26

  "Focus."

"I am focusing!" I exclaim but that's not true. In reality I am not focusing, I'm doing the exact opposite of focusing. I'm trying to but I can't concentrate. I'm supposed to clear my mind and force Troy's voice out of my head but it's impossible to do when my head is full of worry, anxiety and concern.

Troy looks equally frustrated. "No, you're not. I could make you do whatever I wanted to and you'd let me. Come on, Haley. Focus", he nearly growls at me.

We've been doing this for the entire lunch and I haven't been able to break his compulsion once. I haven't even gotten close. So far he has compelled me to quack like a duck, do squats while singing the national anthem and then saying a lot of stupid things in a really loud voice. We are seated in the outside table furthest away from others but we are still gaining weird looks. And it doesn't help that they think that I'm again spending time with my lying and cheating ex. Soon I'll be the laughing stock of this entire town, if I am not already.

I shoot him a glare that he ignores and try again. I look into his eyes and feel the familiar pull when he activates the compulsion. His eyes grow black and I take a deep breath to prepare myself.

"Haley, I want you to give your pizza slice to me."

Oh hell nah, I think confidently but then my fingers wrap around the last slice of my delicious pizza and hand it over to Troy. I'm screaming in my head not to do it but I do it anyway because Troy asked me to. He looks annoyed as he puts the slice back down and barks: "Haley!"

"I'm sorry", I mutter and cast my eyes down. If I was bad at this before I'm even crappier now. I can't hear his voice in my head like I did before and that's how I knew what he was doing. Now I just do whatever he tells me to and it frustrates the hell out of us both.

"I'll just have to make it something you can't stand so you'll feel obligated to resist. Like... Tell me you hate puppies."

I roll my eyes. "That's really lame."

A sudden wildfire lights in his eyes. "Then tell me you want me to kiss you", he smirks. My head feels like it's exploding when I fight to not tell him to kiss me. I squeeze my hands closed, my nails piercing the skin and making it bleed a little. The words are in my throat, ready to bounce out as soon as I give in. It feels like someone is reaching inside of me and pulling them out, forcing me to say what I don't really want to say.

I hold out as long as I possibly can but then the words tumble out. "I want you to kiss me." I hit my hand against the table. "Damn it!"

"I'm really trying not to feel hurt about how much harder that made you fight", Troy says a little bitterly as he breaks the compulsion. My cheeks suddenly feel warm and Troy seems uncomfortable. A few awkward seconds go by before I decide it's time to break this disconcerting silence between us.

"So my mom is going out of her mind with our three alarms. She got home late yesterday and woke up the neighborhood when she couldn't remember the disarming code. Mrs Grundwald is now mad at both of us, for mom because of that and to me because well, because she always is. If our house catches fire tonight we'll certainly burn. She won't lift a finger to help us. This is what she told me when I was punching the numbers into those darn machines", I sigh.

"Yeah, sorry about that", Troy apologizes.

I look at him funny. "What do you mean? It's not your fault. It's not like you broke in."

He shifts uneasily in his seat. "Well, actually..."

I stare at him. "No way. No freaking way! You broke into my mom's? WHY?"

Troy stares at the table when he start talking. "Remember how I told you that in the beginning of my transition I couldn't think about anything else but you? Well, after we broke up that Friday I went home but I felt restless. I knew you were in a distressed state and right after nightfall I went to look for you but you were nowhere. I was so worried that I kind of broke in. At your dad's too. I'm so sorry, Haley. You can tell your mom to send the bill for those alarms to me."

My head is spinning. It was Troy? All this time I had kind of thought that it was Nathan but never got around to ask him about it. It's not really something you bring up in a pillow talk or while driving to school. I had also considered Oliver but could never figure out why he would have bothered to pose as an alarm guy if he had already found a way in.

I can feel Troy's concerned eyes on me. "Haley?"

I let out a huff. "Look, I get that what you had to go through was rough but you can't break into people's houses! My mom is scared to leave the house in case someone tries to strangle her on our front lawn! And my dad and Amy have to worry too which is not good for the baby!"

Troy leans his head on his hands. "I know, I know, I'm so sorry. I was just worried. I won't do it again. I'm better now", he swears trying to catch my eyes. I look away and try not to yell at him. It won't do any good, the damage is already done.

"One more round before we go?" I suggest and he nods.

He casts his now completely black eyes at me. "Tell me you love me", he coaxes me with a velvet like voice that could make any girl swoon. But I can't focus on his words, I need to search my brain for his voice and try to put it out. This time something happens. I start to say the words but then I feel a surge of power. No, I think. I won't say it. No.

"I... I..."

Suddenly Troy is no longer sitting across from me, he's up in the air. Nathan is holding him up with one hand using his supernatural strength. In his other hand I see a silver thing that every now and then catches the light of day. It takes me a second to realize that it's a lighter. I gasp and stagger to my feet. "Nathan, don't!" I scream.

He's not listening to me. "You just don't learn, do you? The second I turn my back you think you can move in on her? That you can compel her to love you again? How fucking stupid are you? Do you not know who I am? I'm a Blood. I see you even when you don't think I do, motherfucker."

And here it is. The side I didn't think existed but I should have known that it does. I stare at him, completely lost at words. 'I'm a Blood'? Did he really just say that?

"Nate, chill. We're in public", his loyal follower Mike tries to calm him down. He doesn't try to stop him though which is weird since Mike is a lot bigger than Nathan. He's one of those guys that look like they eat rocks for breakfast and probably could take Nathan if he really wanted to. But then I take a good look at the fury in Nathan's eyes and guess again. Maybe Mike couldn't.

"No. He's not getting away with this again", Nathan snaps. Even if I have started to try to forgive Troy for his mistakes Nathan clearly isn't.

I find my voice again and say: "Nathan, I asked him to compel me."

He still doesn't let go of Troy but he turns to look at me incredulously. "You what?" he spits.

I don't let his enraged tone scare me. I look him in the eyes and command sounding a lot more calm than I truly feel like: "Put him down and I'll explain it all to you."

His eyes look like green daggers but he slowly lets go of Troy's throat. Troy is very lucky that breathing is no longer vital to him. Out of habit he still takes a deep breath when he's put back down before turning to glare at Nathan. "What the hell is your problem?" Troy snaps.

"You are."

"I'll see you later, Troy", I say sternly. He tries to argue with me and I can tell that he doesn't want to leave me alone with Nathan. But I don't have a chance of calming Nathan down if Troy is here. Fortunately the bell rings and he has to go. He keeps looking over his shoulder as he walks away but in the end he disappears inside the school building.

Nathan is breathing rather heavily as if to control his anger by concentrating only on taking breaths. I take it as my cue and start to explain the situation that I got to admit looked pretty incriminating. "I asked Troy to compel me so I could practice breaking compulsion. Now, before you say anything let me remind you that I am not an idiot and of course made a secret list about all the things he has done to me so if he tried to pull something, I'd still know the truth."

"It's still idiotic. He could have lured you into telling him if you were hiding something and then go destroy it. Or if he was strong enough he could have compelled you into never believing one bad word about him. You don't know. You don't understand how dangerous compulsion is. You do not pet the person who bites you, literally", Nathan snaps.

I shake my head stubbornly. "He's better now", I repeat Troy's words from earlier.

Nathan lets out an exasperated sigh. "You're wrong, Haley. Vampires don't get better. They only get better at hiding their true nature."

I ignore his dig at Troy since I don't think that this is the best time to start defending him. Instead I try to reason with him. "I had to do something. Oliver is breathing down my neck and seems to have the time of his life. The meds Dr Harris gave me are starting to wear off. I could feel Oliver trying to enter my dreams again. So when Troy offered to help me out I jumped at the chance."

Nathan closes his eyes and blows air out of his lungs. He's trying hard to ignore the subject of Troy.

"That's what I was coming here to talk to you about. My sister Bianca is back in town and she's the most skillful mind control user I know. No one has ever been able to break her compulsion or enter her mind. You could come by after school and let her teach you something", Nathan says ignoring the look Mike gives him. His words make my heart beat faster with both excitement and fear. He wants me to go home with him.

Home... to the Blood Manor.