Heart Vs. Mind: Colifer

Chapter 3: Come With Me.

Chapter 3:

After my face went from red back to normal, I was ready to finish this scene. I was so embarrassed by what Id said.  Now that the vows were finished, Killian surprised Emma and serenaded her. Colin took out his guitar and sang a few verses. The song was so gorgeous. He sounded amazing and breathtaking. I know that Hookers and Captain Swan fans have been waiting so long for Colin to sing on the show, and Colin finally agreed for the last episode.

After he had finished, we were again, face to face, finishing the ceremony. Archie was our pastor. Finally, the last Captain Swan kiss of the series was coming. My stomach was in knots and I couldn't breathe. I was shaky. I just wanted to kiss him and be done and walk away. After today I will have a different life, and I will move on from Colin with a great guy.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. Killian, you may kiss the bride".

He smiled at me and I faked one back. This was supposed to be a longer, more passionate kiss than usual, which made me even more skeptical. He leaned in, and put his hands around my waist. When he realized I wasn't leaning in to kiss him, he pulled me in and kissed me. It lasted for about 5 or 6 seconds, longer than I expected. Not that I wanted the kiss to end, because I didn't, I wish I could wake up with him every morning and fall asleep next to him every night.

I'm not in the denial stage anymore. About a year ago when I realized I was in love with Colin, I was full of denial. I didn't want to believe it. I knew I could never love him. Or, at least tell him. Realizing this caused me so much pain and sleepless nights. Being with him makes my day, my week, my everything. I just don't know how I'm going to leave him after seeing him every day for six years. Even during hiatuses we saw each other often.

Then, we were done. We filmed a short, mini scene at Granny's and we were finished,

I packed up most of my things in my trailer when I heard a knock on the door.

"Jen, are you still in there?"

It was Colin. My heart pitter pattered, but my mind told me knock it off.

"Hey Colin, yeah I'm in here. Come in."

"Hey Jen. How is all the packing going?"

Colin looked around and saw all my boxes and bags. He looked at me with a half-smile. This was such a bittersweet situation, without any sweet. I couldn't find any reasons how walking away from Once could be beneficial. This show has become my life, especially the people in it.

"So Jen, what are your plans? Are you staying in your apartment in Vancouver or are you moving back to LA?"

"Well my mom and my sister are coming tonight. Tomorrow we are taking mostly everything back to LA and the rest of the stuff will stay in my Vancouver apartment. I'm going to stay here for a little while until I am ready to part with this place and move back to LA."

I probably sounded like a little baby...like I couldn't bear to leave Vancouver. But Colin knows me well, and he knows I am terrible with change. I hated the idea of leaving Vancouver.

"What are your plans?" I said.

"Since I have the house in Vancouver, I am going to make it a "getaway" for Helen, the kids and I. I'd rather leave it in my possession than have to go through the hassle of selling it, Plus, I'm going to miss this place too, so the house will be here for when we visit."

'We'. I hated when he said that.

"That sounds like a plan", I said a little broken-hearted.

"Actually, since you are staying here for a little while after we get back, I was hoping you would agree to keep an eye on the house. Just make sure nobody breaks in or it doesn't become an abandoned party house." He chuckled.

"Of course, no problem."

Wait. After "we get back"? What was he talking about?

"Where are we going? You said 'after we get back'."

Actually Jen, I was hoping you would come back to Ireland with me for a few weeks. I am joining The Enemies again, which may cause for late nights of practices. I told Helen and she mentioned that if you weren't doing anything, maybe you'd like to come along to give her and the kids some company?"

"Oh Colin, I don't-"

"You don't have to if you don't want too. Helen will probably be bummed but she will understand."

"No, I want to. When do we leave?"

"In a week,"

This sure sounded like something I'd regret, but at least Colin and I could spend some time together. That could also be something I regret.

Colin gave me my coat and put it on me.

"Come on, love.  Take a break and go out to eat."

10 minutes later, our driver picked us up and took us.
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