Two Lives. One Boy.

Chapter 4- 'Now Isn't The Best Time To Discuss Deep Issues'.

I was fidgeting, picking at the hem of my sleeve and my eyes were darting around nervously. Stop biting your perfectly manicured nails! I mentally told myself but somehow nerves took over me and I noticed my nails starting to chip and rolled my eyes. So much for filing my nails, all gone to waste now. Brilliant!

I gazed around the magnificent hall with 'wealth' written boldly over the majestic walls and hanging chandeliers. Obviously not literally, I mean at just one glance, you know everything in here costs a fortune. My curled blond hair sprawled across my shoulders, flowing to just above my elbows. I felt the long red dress hug at my figure along with my matching red lipstick and my perfect doll face which belongs on a magazine front cover.

I knew I was beautiful. The perfectly iced cake with an extra cherry on top. Yes, that's what my grandmother calls me. A perfect, sweet cupcake with a cherry on top. If only she knew the sweet cupcake actually had the most spiciest filling which would make you gasp and scream. What was that saying again? Oh yeah, don't judge a book by its cover. So let's say my cover is all pretty and pink, but inside a horror book fills the blank pages with deadly ink. Okay, maybe I'm being a bit too dramatic.

My cover is quite impressive, I must say. A Victoria secret model, with the only dream of being as big as Cara Delevigne or the Kardashians, strolling the catwalk like a queen. What a life! A boring life, in my opinion. You need that bit of adrenaline to pump in your veins, to make you feel more alive then ever.

Everyone looked my direction as I strolled past them. Well I am a model after all. However I felt out of place although I was the most fitting person here. Dressed like a celebrity, treated like a celebrity. I loved attention. Call me selfish, call me vein. I don't have a care in the world what you want to say about me. I'm rich, I'm a rebel, I've got the perfect boyfriend anyone can dream of. And guess what? My boyfriend is in a drug dealing company! Sexy I know. And now I'm part of the fun. The pure fun. That's the part of my life which pumps adrenaline in my veins. But why do I still feel there's something wrong?

God, I was so stupid. Finding someone working in a drug company sexy!? I seriously feel ashamed. I shook my head trying to focus in the maths lesson but I kept zoning out and thinking about the past, I do that a lot. Focus! I told my brain staring hard at the geometry on the board in front of me but I just couldn't. Not when the teacher's dull voice droned on and on.

Jack started making his way across the hall talking business with a bunch of other men. God, him in his suit. I had to check if I'd accidently been drooling! I felt like the luckiest girl alive although people kept saying Jack was the luckiest man alive. A random man came up to me and said, "Oh stop staring at him like that, you shouldn't be dating such a dodgy boy, he's just going to drag you down!" He was like forty and I was only fifteen! Sure, I might have looked eighteen but still I just wanted him to back off!  He was so close to me and I was debating whether I should punch him or give him the 'bitch glare' and walk away.

"Jealous are ya?" Jack grinned at me while the man raised an eyebrow, "Oh no, I'm too old don't you think?" He quickly turned his attention back to me, "darling I don't even think you should be dating at this point. Jack is four years older than you! What happened to gcse?" I laughed, "I did them early. And anyway I've got better things to do than waste time on education, we've got f***ing lives to live!" I inched closer to Jack and he snaked an arm around my waist.

Jack rolled his eyes, "You can go now."

The man shrugged, "I was just being sensible. God, children nowadays." He walked off shaking his head.

"You're looking beautiful, as always," Jack whispered seductively in my ear while I giggled.

I felt like gagging at the very thought of Jack. I brought a hand to my head. This is what happens when you keep bringing back memories of the past! A voice nagged at me. I felt sick. Sick of how I fell for that disgusting guy. That guy who only wanted sex. That guy who cheated on me hundreds of times. That guy who didn't break my heart into two. He shattered it into a billion gazillion trillion pieces. I was so naïve back then. If only I'd listened to that forty year old man and knocked some sense into my brain.