Jariana: The unreachable

Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

“Ariana?” Joan tears up. “That isn’t the girl who loved her job more than anything?” “that isn’t my daughter” she says with a tiny edge of anger to her voice. “I’m sorry” I burst into tears accepting her arms embracing around me tightly. “We can’t stay here” Joan mumbles “I know, let’s go home” I say “no Ariana, I mean we can’t stay in LA” “But our home is here?” I mutter confused. “We need to start somewhere fresh, there will be too many people wanting to ask you questions and people will track us down” “We will start fresh?” I feel myself turning white and puke is starting to slide up my throat.

“Where are you going?” Joan shouts as I make a run for a hedge before I let out all the food I have eaten today. I can’t stop crying, it actually hurts so much I can’t breathe. I am in public and anyone could photograph me right now but I just can’t control my tears. “My love” Joan presses my face into her chest to hide my face from the paparazzi starting to come into view. She drags me into the car and lets me kneel down and lets down a few blinds onto the windows so people can’t see in, only we can see out.

I can tell from how much I am crying that mum wants to cry, she hates seeing me so sad. Concentrating on the road but I know she is only speeding because the stupid paparazzi is chasing us trying to get photos of me. How can they even know where I am and what is happening? Seriously I don’t want any attention and especially not right now. It is the worst of times.

“If I let you out here you must run home quickly and don’t turn around” Joan says with full seriousness “but” I say still choked up and in tears. “Now!” Joan says being protective. I do as she says and I think I manage to get away with no photo taken of me. But of course, I am wrong. When I get under my safe blankets of my bed with all the shutters closed and the lights off I press twitter to see loads of mentions from fans saying “I hope you are okay, always here for you” but what how do they know? I know something isn’t right and some people are saying “you look so ugly when you cry Eww” what how would they know? I cry harder with these comments.

Trying to ignore it is impossible though, on my newsfeed people are tweeting so much laughter and a link to a website..Well I need cheering up so it wouldn’t matter if I checked it out. “Ahhhh” I let out a scream filled with more tears flowing out of my eyes like crazy, the page is loads of photos from a paparazzi and they are of me, I am crying in them and I look like a total wreck. What are people going to think of me now? Oh my god. This day could never get any worse.

On my DMS I see some supportive messages from fans, it’s cute that some of them still love me even though of this drama. “Thanks” “love u” I reply to a few before I just don’t feel even well enough, I don’t have enough strength. Clicking onto Jai’s DM I see I have even a few new ones from him. “I hope you are okay, I saw the photos and I am so worried, don’t listen to what anyone says. You are always beautiful and strong. Wish I could hold you and never let you go right now I just want to comfort you </3” I reply with “thanks, strangely you made me smile and that feels impossible. I want a hug so badly. Thank you” “you’re here omg baby :’(“ Jai replies straight away. Jai sends his number and I start messaging him with that instead of DMS. “Hello its Ariana” I send first.