"Feels like I'll never be the same. Just like a dream of last night. Just like pictures in my head. Oh, I can't realize that. Still, I wonder why it is."
Quick update:
Gobs of white were seen everywhere. Even on trees, animals and cars as white-pristine crystals continually to fall from the sky. The sidewalks were covered with white blanket and evergreens, it was cold. Jungkook crossed the streets, listening to the faint tinkle of a snowman and Christmas tree chimes on either way. Mindless of the snow falling heavy around, it was white, pure and forgiving.
When you're just waiting, do you know that certain kind of feeling? That feeling of relief and desperation. Nothing is wrong but nothing is right either.
She's the only one Jungkook had ever truly counted on. A part of him, wanting to go back but the other part of him, fretting the only existence of her would not be easily forgotten. What if, she'd show herself up in the next years of his life? Will he be able to handle this? He could at least find out, giving himself a faintest hope.
The phone unexpectedly rang in the background, drawing back to his senses. It was the person he hated the most, his father. Jungkook ignored his phone call, stuffing it back into his leather jacket. Tchー he never wanted to see his father's face neither the new money w.hore woman of his, it was d.amn sickening.
The sky was pale again, gleaming dots too far away to cast any light as a foggy breath escape from his mouth. Reminiscing the him who was before. Was this the right thing to do? Seeing himself anew, moving forward and continued bracing a life he once missed.
A second chance given to him, to live, to cherish and dream once more. It's been a year has passed since Jungkook came as a trainee under the label of BigHit Entertainment. His life changed, giving him the courage to face the merciless world yet it was still beautiful to behold.
~
"Get ready."
V smirked and Jungkook nodded in response as anticipation filled his gut. The song sounded into his ears for about thirty and nine seconds. A cue start before Rapmon released the extremes of his voice, rapping his lines with pure magnificence. Not even once did his voice faltered as the young man turned his attention to the crowd, watching them with joyous sight and excitement. This time, the stage was for him to be owned.
Jungkook began to rap his lines as Rapmon ended his, esthetically. Slide, step and jump. His heart skipped a beat but that didn't stop him from jumping higher with V to his right and J-hope to his left. The chorus came again and so as the jumping part was repeated. The sweats running through his body was never a threat and continued to release his fullest of energy. Ending the stage with a blast as the clamorous sound of yells and cheers from the crowd filled the background. It was never a vexation but rather an indulgence. Encouraging the group to perform with even more breathtaking comeback stage performances. A future with higher expectations awaits.
~
Everyone cheered in chorus as V and Rapmon gave Jungkook their highest of fives. The dance studio was transformed into a set. More like into a partyー balloons, confetti and such were everywhere. BTS Live Trilogy: The Red Bullet Concert Tour in Seoul was a huge success to the group. An accomplishment paid by pure sweats, time and efforts of the whole team. It was like a new drug to him. He wanted more of the distraction he only had.
"Come on bud." V hooked an arm around his shoulder like a drunkard ass. "You shouldn't miss this."
"I know. Just gimme a sec." Jungkook answered back, laying hold of a tee to change but something fell down on the concrete ground.
The snow had started again, laying in pure scallops as it drifted along the perimeters. Edging its way to the front window of the dressing room. Hung in between with nothing but the sound of a wind howling, filling the gaps. He still have it, all this time.
Jungkook might have found the strength to walk away but the courage to relieve himself was becoming close to despair.
What life had been like years before?
He tried to remember, trying to pull it back through the haze of her shadow. Just then, a horrible, nagging dread threatened to snuff-out the air into his lungs. It suffocated him with new memories as he pored himself over the photo. It was in front of him. A vivid glaring memory but Jungkook could only snag scraps of their memories. A half-formed photo of a girl he knew every slightest detail of her in twilight-obsidian cocktail dress, hugging her petite yet refined body. Her lingering warmth that was leaning on his body he longed throughout the years. She was a true beauty yet delicate at the same time.
How can the only thing that's killing me make me feel so alive?
Years of good-byes, promises to be with her for a Friday dinner, returning with smiles and warm embraces. And all the while, how had I not known? How had I looked into her eyes, listened to her words and not been able to see the reality.
Author's note: Who else still reading this s.hit? Lmao
©Wandering_galaxy21
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Forget Me Not [DELETING SOON]
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