c a n d y h e a r t s

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"I want to have a good body, but not as much as I want dessert." – Jason Love

Disclaimer: The character who appears in this chapter is from another story of mine, Chalky Hearts, which is currently unpublished.

P.S. Thank you for 1K reads!

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"Fletcher, I am going to throttle you for hanging up on me, you asshole!"

"Uh, what?"

"Argh, I don't even have the energy to argue with you, you–"

"I think you dialed the wrong number."

"–Dumb fu– wait, what?"

"Oh yeah, you definitely have the wrong number."

"Hold on, you're not Fletcher."

"Last time I checked, my name begins with E and ends with van."

"Oh yeah, you're definitely not Fletcher."

"Well, I don't remember doing something so incriminating that a girl would be screaming at me for being a dumb fuck. Apart from my sister, of course, who's always breathing down my neck about something or rather."

"Oh god, I'm sorry! This wasn't intentional, and you're not the dumb fuck. That title is reserved for my stupid phone buddy."

"It's okay– Holly, stop being so impatient! We'll make it in time!"

"Holly?"

"She's my sister– for fuck's sake, chill out! No, I'm not being careless! Can someone please calm her down?"

"Uh, is this a bad time?"

"Now it's my turn to be sorry, I'm just very preoccupied at the mo– don't ask me, I don't know how! Just sedate her before the others get here!"

"Well, aren't you guys just super calm?"

"Oh, for sure. We're positively oozing with calmness. Zen central here."

"You know, it's been forever since I've heard anyone speaking with such a sexy voice."

"I beg your pardon?"

"Oh shit, did I say that out loud?"

"Don't freak, I'm friends with this girl who used to constantly call me Hot Evan out loud. She doesn't know I know she does it. Her boyfriend's been putting her off my scent."

"I suddenly don't feel so socially awkward anymore."

"You're welcome."

"Wait, when did I thank you?"

"Anyway, I have to go. Good luck calling the right number!"

"It was nice talking to you, E with a van!"

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