Billie ended up speaking with Mike. Quite a bit, too. They had a great deal in common, really. They had similar music taste and they were both very upset over the whole... 'thing'. Billie had gone out with Mike. Billie had slept with Mike.
But Billie had also had to leave Mike's house early the next morning for his final exam. In that short time, someone had broken into Mike's apartment and shot him. Billie had mourned for weeks. He had no one. Zero, zip, zilch, nada. He was completely alone.
Then he had met Gerard. Gerard had promised him that he could get Billie doing something, making a difference. Billie hadn't cared what it was. It could have been that Billie Joe Armstrong was intoxicated and drunk. It could have been he was depressed and mourning. It could have been that, hey! Maybe he just wanted to get away from everything-everyone-he had known.
It had worked, too. If not for a little while. He had made it all those years, never having to put up with someone from his old life, never having to worry about his family's problems, anything. He left the HQ once a year. The day his father died. He went to the grave, much after most people would, and laid a bouquet of flowers on the grave. He missed his old man. He had been twelve. His dad died when he was only twelve.
Billie smiles sadly at the memory. At the funeral he had run home and locked himself in his room. His mom had followed and begged him to come out. He had only responded with, "Wake me up when September ends."
But now, all these years later... He had run into him. Spencer Smith. His ex who had cheated on him. Who was now a cop and had a wife and kids. It wasn't until after he'd fixed Gerard's bullet wound and patched it over that he'd allowed himself to look the man in the eyes.
"Thank you." Billie had said when Mikey and Gerard had left the small room. Spencer did a double-take. Billie smiled kindly.
"What did you say to me?" Spencer sounded incredulous. Billie hadn't heard him say that since he'd told him he loved him. Spencer had been overjoyed. He couldn't believe it.
"Thank you. If it weren't for you, Spencer, I-." He choked off, thinking of Mike. "I never would have met someone special." Spencer nodded slowly.
"You're welcome? I guess..." he sounded uncomfortable. "Listen, Billie, I hadn't meant to do any of that to you, honest. I stilled cared about you back then, I just... I had my priorities in all the wrong places." He sighed, leaning forward. Billie moved closer to him.
"It's fine. I'm over it. I have been for a while, now." Spencer smiled and nodded.
"I'm glad to hear that. Who was he?" Billie smiled at the floor and pulled his knees up to his chest.
"Mike Dirnt. He's dead now, though, so it doesn't matter." He said quickly.
"I'm sorry... Billie." Billie only shrugged and stood up. Spencer followed the action.
"It doesn't matter anymore. I'm just here to help Gerard get Frank back. You understand, don't you?" He nodded, shoving his hands in his pockets. Gerard's head poked around the door and he eyed the two of them suspiciously for a moment before shrugging it off.
"Let's go, Billie." Billie nodded and went to grab his bag as Gerard's head retreated back behind the door, but Spencer grabbed him and spun him around.
"Spencer?" Billie asked, afraid. This was a cop, after all. A cop with a gun that could shoot him if he had a grudge. For all Billie knew, he could have been faking the happiness and he could shoot him right here and now and Billie would probably die. But Spencer only backed him against a wall, pinned him there.
And kissed him.
Billie couldn't help but let himself think he was in college again and doing what he always did with Spencer, and that was kiss him. Whenever he could, just to know that he wouldn't leave him. Just to know that he wasn't alone anymore.
Just to know that someone loved him out there.
Spencer's hands settled on Billie's hips as the shorter of the two kept his eyes closed, knowing that seeing the taller of the two in his police uniform would ruin the image that he had in his mind. The first time they'd done anything but hold hands. The first time Billie had had a proper make-out session with anyone. The first time he had told Spencer he loved him.
But all too soon, it had to end. Gerard was calling for Billie and Spencer was pulling away-albeit reluctantly- and letting Billie grab his bag.
He was letting Billie go.
(I KNOW, I KNOW. IT'S A SHIT CHAPTER, I'M WORKING ON THIS SHIT, TRUST ME. THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE OKAY, I PROMISE.)
