I Need You Here Right Now (Kohnnie)

Chapter 6

Johnnie and Alex stayed behind while Bryan and I went to the apartment. While we walked up the stairs it was silent. Not the good kind. Bryan knew what I was thinking. He knew that I hated seeing my crush walk away doing who knows what with my friend.

"Kyle what do you want to do." Bryan asked. He wanted to do everything he could to distract me from my thoughts.

"Sleep." I walked in the door took off my vans and walked to the room I was staying in. I just need to be alone right now. I walk over to the window opening it letting the fresh air calm me down. I look outside and I see the most horrible, revolting, disgusting thing I've ever seen. Johnnie and Alex kissing right outside.

Like I know that they are together and all, but I don't want to see them sucking face when I want to look at the night sky. Is that really to much to ask?

I close the widow, and close the curtains. I felt my heart break into a million tiny pieces. The tears forming in my eyes. No. I'm not going to cry over some dumb boy. I just need to calm down and relax. I walk out into the hallway and go into the bathroom. I strip down and step into the shower. That's what I needed a warm shower to make me feel better. I turned the faucet and felt the warm water hit against my skin. All I could hear was the water falling down and the thoughts in my head. My head was a mess. The picture kept coming up of them kissing. My eyes started to fill up with tears and I finally let them fall. "Fuck...." I mumble as more tears steamed down my face. I hate crying even if I'm all by my self. I feel weak, like I'm officially broken. And I am. I'm broken and so is my heart. It finally hit me. I was dumb to think I had a chance with him. That maybe just maybe he felt the same way. I want to be the one that kisses, holds, and touches him. But he is with Alex. At least he is with an amazing beautiful girl. Alex is so nice and caring. Unlike me who is selfish for wanting Johnnie for my self. They like each other and they are happy and I have to move on.

I step out of the shower and look in the mirror. The fog from the shower doesn't let me see myself in the mirror. If I did I bet I would make myself feel worse. I grab the towel and wrap it around my waist. I put my ear against the door making sure I don't hear any voices so I can walk out to go into my room. All I heard was silence. I ran across the hall and into the room. I changed into a large old sweater and pijama pants.

I got into my bed and got under the sheets. I felt so alone right now. It wasn't just because of one boy it was so many other things. At home I had no one just a few people I hanged out with but they are just people I know. My family says they love me but they don't show it. They are usally working. When it's their day off they barley pay attention to me. They wish that I will give up on my youtube and get a "real" job. When I got on that plane to go to LA I was ready to be happy surrounded by people and actually not feel alone for once in my pathetic life. I wanted hang out with Johnnie, Alex, and Bryan. Be weird, make videos, just be best of friends. But me being me I push them away because of my feelings.

Slowly I drifted off to sleep. My eyes closed and I hope that they never open again.

I woke up to the sound of Alex laughing and Johnnie and Bryan screaming at each other. All I need to do is put a fake smile on my face and it will be okay.

I grabbed my phone

To Lindsey: Hey do u want to hang out today idc when

I'm going to do anything to get Johnnie out of my mind. Anything. I just wish I can forget him because I can say I'm over him for a while but I keep crawling right back.

Lindsey: Sure how about the park right across the mall at 2

To Lindsey: Sounds good see u there

Was it wrong to text her. Yes, but right now I don't care. I'm selfish I don't want to feel pain anymore. But how far will I go.

It's 11 I have time to get ready. I put on the first thing I saw. Skinny jeans and a plain black shirt with a black jacket. I put on a beanie and walked into the living room.

"Where are you going?" Bryan asked. Ugh I don't want to tell them that I'm going to see a girl they will think I'm dating her. "With a friend. See you guys later." They waved bye to me as I walked out the door. I got to the the park and I see Lindsey sitting with a note book and a pencil in her hand. She looked alone, something I feel all the time.

I walked up to bench she was sitting at and sat next to her. "Hey, what are you writing?" She looked up at me and blushed. She closed the notebook and put it behind her back. "Oh nothing it's embarrassing."
"Oh come on. Do you write stories?" She shook her head. "Songs? Poems? What?" She flipped through the book. From what I can see whatever she writes about she writes alot. "Well I write whatever comes in my head. Ideas, poems, small lyrics. Just random things it helps me." I grabbed the notebook, flipped to a random page and read the words that she wrote.
"She shoved her words in my mouth while my while world crashed. The tears filled my eyes as she just laughed. She was my life but I was not hers."

I looked up at her. How can she write like this. "What made you write this? Is it about someone? Wait? Is it about a girl?" I saw the expression on her face she looked worried. "Uh no I mean yes I mean uh. Kinda. The person i wrote that about was my girlfriend at the time. I'm bisexual." I nodded it makes sense she must have went through something to make her write that. The rest of her writings were sad also but expect one. It was happy filled with joy and hope. "What does this one mean?" She looked at the date and at the word written down on the paper. "It was the day I met her we were in a coffee shop she sat down next to me and we talked for hours. We learned about each other and I was so happy. Bug things change." I felt bad for asking that.

Later that day we walked and talked about band we liked and all he things we have in common. I didn't fell like telling her about my sexuality just yet.

I walked her home she lived in a small town house in a small neighborhood. "Bye Lindsey." I said giving her a hug. "Bye Kyle. Thank you." She got on her tippy toes and pecked me on the lips for a quick second and ran inside. I didn't know how to feel about that. She's nice, funny, smart, doesn't seem fake. But she's not Johnnie.

A/N: story will now be in only Kyle's POV and thanks for 500 views