The Acting Project

i started writing this on wattpad a while ago and then deleted it because i was caught up with another story. this is redone-remade and i hope you like it. if you dont i dont care, i dont want to be a writer one day i just love writing what im feelin on a piece of paper.

also please dont plagerize my story. thats a really low blow. just saying. its not worth it.

and i know probably no one read that paragraph above. thats ok. i expected that.

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The Acting Project

The Beginning. - Prologue

"You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip." -Jonathan Carroll

I've had one dream forever. A single dream. Only one thing was on my mind at all times.

To be a singer.

To be a singer and a performer. The lights, the glamour, and everything in between. Even the hard work, which I won't mind if the end results in a Grammy or two.

When I stand on that stage with the lights coming down on my face or that beautiful standing ovation I know this is what I'm meant for. I get that bubbly feeling in my stomach. It's a combination of nerves, excitement, and adrenaline.

I crave the opportunity to be on stage. I'm a musical theater junkie. Ever since I was little, I've loved the attention. So maybe I'm just an attention whore. Oh well.

The first play I saw was the Music Man. I knew by the intermission that I wanted to be on stage for the rest of my life. If I could live in Carnegie Hall I would.

My goal was to be an actress. I was going to be an actress. An Actress. Acting. Hm. Has a nice ring to it don't you think?

Acting is all I do now.

I am addicted to it!

I was raised in a small town; well it wasn't that small, it was just small to me. It is the kind of town where everyone knows your business before you do. Your past makes you, and it made me.

That should be sewn on a pillow.

I auditioned for a grandiose performing arts high school and I knew that if I did not get in, this would not be the end. I was not accepted.

This is where the audience in my head goes, "AWWWWW!"

In addition, of course, you hear, "This doesn't mean you're not talented."

I took it hard. Really hard. I was depressed the whole summer. One second I was ok, the next it seemed as though the universe was against me and I couldn't think straight. I know, I know, I sound like a crazy person.

I might be. I probably am.

Do you ever have that feeling when you want something so bad and if you don't get it your life will be over?

I know I'm a drama queen.

For me, it was if I didn't get my dream I would probably place it in a drawer (the dream), and it would be never thought about again.

Wait, I take that back.

I would think about it. I would think about it all the time. Especially if I didn't run with my dream, I know I would have thought, "What if?" I'm a flight or fight kind of person. I read once "I'd rather have a life of 'Oh wells' then a life of 'What if?''. That really describes me.

Basically during high school I convinced myself that I needed a more realistic dream something not that wild.

I laugh at that now. Yeah, because being an actress is so wild. Following your dream is wild. Being happy in life is wild.

Well I went to a regular high school Yawn! and was in the drama department. Over the next four years, it took some crying and some praying. And some more crying.

I know drama queen.

Sometimes asking God for an answer as to why he gave me such an outrageous dream and not let me get there. I hated the fact that I could sing and act. I knew i had the talent, no one would give me a chance. That was the problem.

I would listen to music and cry, so upset that I craved for talent.

I wanted acting skills like Audrey Hephurn or a voice like Adele. But that kind of talent is only once a generation. I seriously think that we will have no more truly talented people. Almost like God used up all of the talent on Marilyn Monroe and Elizabeth Taylor.

Darn them.

Maybe if I thought of my life as still being written then my teen years would have gone smoother. I would have had an easier time being a teenager too.

But when is being a teenager ever easy?

Well I was accepted into a prestigious drama school in New York City.

Happy dance!

Wow, can you believe that I was going to be living in the Broadway capitol of the world. Of course you will believe me, I could tell you I was a leprechaun and you would believe me. Now that I'm reading over that, if you have any common sense or have at least some IQ you wouldn't probably believe I was a leprechaun. Ok now that the random part is over.

I started to have hope again. Hope is such a great word. I really love it.

Maybe this was all in God's plan. First year was great, second year was fantastic and third year could not be any better. This last year of school I would have never dreamed this would happen. Talk about catching me by surprise!

A big surprise. A really big surprise. Somewhere along the lines of moving half way across the world for a dumb project that makes no sense at all.