One, Two, Three

Chapter thirty-one

One,

Two,

Three.

It's been three hours and I'm still sober. It sucks dick. Whenever I get a drink Romeo takes it away. It's not fair, everyone else is drinking and having a good time. I don't get why I can't, all I want is to get drunk. I know it's not for good reasons, but still. I can't stop thinking about my dad. It's all my fault. My dad and I were close. Not like close enough for me to tell him my secrets or anything, but close enough that I would make dirty jokes with him. I miss him so much. I don't know what's going to happen now. I don't know how Carson is going to take care of a 15 year old girl. He is still a kid himself. He's only 19. I don't want him giving up his whole life to take care of me. I'm not worth it. But at the same time I don't want to have him and all my friends. If he can't take care of me then I have to go live with my aunt and uncle. (Who I hate by the way) I know Romeo said I would live with him, but I don't think I would be able to. Gosh! Life's a bitch! It seems so stupid to try your whole life to be accepted and in the end you regret it. "Babe, are you ok?" My thoughts are brought to a screeching stop. I shake the thoughts out of my head. I look at him. He has a drunk smile on his face. I giggle. Jack is so weird, I love it. "Yea, I'm fine." I say smiling. Of course it's one big lie. But I know it makes him feel good. It's crazy how just a few weeks ago I could barely stand the kid. Now we are a thing. I don't even know what we are. My thoughts are interrupted again by someone grabbing my hand. I look down and see a tan hand. I look up and see Romeo. He's pulling me up off the couch. "Where we goin?" I ask as I follow him. Romeo's not drunk. I made sure of that. He has a bit of a drinking problem. He has been in the hospital four times because of it. This last time I made him get help. If his family wasn't going to do anything them I was. "Porsche, what's wrong?" I try to look a surprised, but he sees right through that. "Nothing. Why do you ask?" Romeo knows something's wrong. "Don't lie to me. I know when something's wrong." I try to walk out of the room, but he grabs my wrist. I try to pull away but he's to strong.