nothing without your love

chapter 1

~Melany~

*FLASHBACK*

i hear him sing my favorite song.

his voice keeps repeating in my head..

"She sits up high surrounded by the sun one million branches and she loves every one

Mom and dad, did you search for me?

I've been up here for so long I'm going crazy

And as the sun went down We ended up on the ground

I heard the train shake the windows You screamed over the sound

And as we owned this night I'll put your body to the test with mine

This love was out of control 3, 2, 1, where did it go?

Now don't be crazy, (us) now

Ofcourse you can't stay here

you know it's going on ten years "Big deal, I guess you're official"

I only said it 'cause I know what it's like to feel burned out, and down

We've all been there sometimes

But tonight I'll make you feel beautiful once again

And as the sun went down We ended up on the ground

I heard the train shake the windows You screamed over the sound

And as we owned this night I'll put your body to the test with mine

This love was out of control 3, 2, 1, where did it go?

If I were you, I'd put that away

See, you're just wasted and thinking about the past again

Darling, you'll be okay

And she said "If you were me, you'd do the same, 'cause I can't take anymore I'll draw the shades and close the door I'm not alright and I would rather.."

And as the sun went down We ended up on the ground

I heard the train shake the windows You screamed over the sound

And as we owned this night I'll put your body to the test with mine

This love was out of control

Tell me where did it go?"

~

i wake up because of it. he sits next to me and strokes my hair softly. when i open my eyes he smiles. "goodmorning beautiful" i hear him say and he kisses my head. i love waking up like this..

~END FLASHBACK~

i wake up, i dreamed about him again. one of the days he woke me up singing. it wasn't just a dream.. 'cause it happened. another night has gone by and i never heard of vic since last year. i only know where they are touring. next week they are here in LA but i'm not going. seeing him would hurt me. i miss what we had and i hate how it all ended that one day.. i remember it like it was yesterday but i don't want to think about it anymore. i get up and get dresses. i walk downstairs and make some coffee. I make some breakfast and then look at it. i try to eat but i can't. today it's been a year since the break up and i'm still not over him.

i'm alone since he left me. i gave up everything for him back then. i have no one left. my friends left because i was always with vic. ofcourse i had tony, mike and jaime but since the breakup we didn't see or speak eachother anymore. i still have all the texts vic had send me. every 'i love you' and every 'i miss you" but i also have the texts were he apoligized for leaving me, were he told how sorry he was.

i still read them and sometimes i want to text him. but i don't think he still has the same number.

should i text him one more time?

~vic~

we are on our way to LA. it's been a while since we've been there. almost a year. next week we will have two shows in LA and i know the building is near to were Melany used to live. somehow i hope she still lives there. i want to know if she moved on, if she has a boyfriend who treats her right. and not like i did. i've hurt her and i know i did. i regret it every day since. i really want to speak her. but if i would call her now she would ask me why i didn't call sooner and hang up on me. she hates me. i'm sure she hates me.. and she has every reason to. i can't believe i left her like that after a beautiful and perfect relationship. how stupid have i been to let her slip away.. i'll send her a ticket to the show. i hope she will come, but i don't think she will.

"dude are you allright?" i hear jaime say. he sits next to me and punches me playfull. "yeah it's just, LA" i say, i know jaime will understand. "Melany right?" he says. it just hurts to hear her name again. no one mentioned it since the breakup. everyone was hurt and everyone misses her. even mike, i just know he does. "yeah, i just don't know why it all went like that back then" i answer. i burry me head in my hands. i feel that my eyes are watering. i never cried because of her before but now, now i'm just hurt. i guess i now feel like she felt back then. but probably she already forgot me.