PUNS!

Puns: Part Two

Even more puns
What temperature is a baby? Womb-temperature
Plateaus are the highest form of flattery
If Markiplier was a plane, he'd be Markiflyer
If Markiplier was doing drugs, he'd be Markihigher
If Markiplier wasn't truthful, he'd be Markiliar
What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stair? A condescending con descending
Did you hear the joke about the high wall? It's hilarious. I'm still trying to get over it
Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection except one. He's never gonna give you up
I support farming. I guess you could call me protractor
A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog. It's a shitzu
Today, you are one day closer to eating a plate of nachos. But if you die tomorrow and never eat the nachos, it's nacho lucky day
What do you call the end of agriculture? Farmageddon
Originally, I didn't like having a moustache. But then it grew on me
The five years Green Arrow was presumed dead, he wasn't always on the island. I guess you could say he was Oliver the place
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana
What do you call a fast zombie? A zoombie
Why does a moon rock taste better than an earth rock? It's a little meteor
What do you call a vegetable on a unicycle? A unicorn
What do you call evil transportation? Elevader
What do you call an evil professor? Darth Grader
How do bees keep their hair looking nice? They use a honey comb
Being struck by lightning is a shocking experience
I wanted a photographic memory, but it never developed
What do you call a plant that looks like a pig? A hedgehog
My animal puns are really boaring
Why did the scarecrow fail as a comedian? His jokes were too corny
What do you call a fruit robbery? A strobbery
Percy: My name is Persea Jackson
Frank: That was an amazhang pun
Jason: I'm shocked by how good it was
Leo: Things sure are heating up
Nico: You're all dead to me
What do you call a sleep-walking nun? A roamin catholic
I have a fear of speedbumps. But I'm slowly getting over it
I saw a kidnapping today. I decided not to wake him up
What happens to nitrogen when the sun rises? It becomes daytrogen
Don't be mean. Be median or mode
But a sheep. Name it Relation. Now you have a relationsheep
Getting paid to sleep is my dream job
If you wear cowboy clothes, you are ranch dressing
What's a god's favorite day? Thorsday
What do you call a fast reporter? A news Flash

The puns will return soon! Right after I kill goddamn autocorrect!