"I don't ask you to love me always like this, but I ask you to remember. Somewhere inside me there'll always be the person I am tonight." - F. Scott Fitzgerald, Tender is the Night
Tessa had a crush on her neighbour. She lived with her parents in a remote part of the city that was surrounded by soybean fields and horses. The only other house was across the gravel road. The family who lived there had a daughter the same age as her named Nella. By default they had become great friends, and slowly, Tessa realized she didn't want to just be Nella's friend.
Nella had wicked, curly orange hair that stuck up in every direction and freckles lightly sprinkling her nose. Nella was fearless and confident and Tessa felt the same way when she was in Nella's presence. Nella didn't wear make-up or care what the other girls at school thought about her wild hair and faded Bon Jovi t-shirts.
Tessa wasn't sure if Nella liked girls in that way, but she often called Tessa beautiful. It made Tessa's cheeks flame and her heart thud faster. Nella acted delighted at Tessa's bashfulness, so Tessa decided it was worth a shot. She loved Nella and she wanted to tell her in a silly, romantic way, so that they could laugh about it years later.
One thing the girls shared was a complete obsession with Orange Crush pop. They didn't care about the eleven teaspoons of sugar per can. They couldn't get enough of the stuff. They'd go to the corner store near their houses, buy six cans, drink them in one night, and then go back for more. It got to the point where their parents had to hold an Orange Crush intervention for the girls. The pop wasn't allowed in either of their houses, but they still drank it during lunch break at school or sitting in Tessa's car in a parking lot after school.
Tessa decided to do an Orange Crush themed love confession. She bought a large bottle from the venting machine and inside the plastic label Tessa put a note. She made sure it stuck out of the edge of the wrapper, so Nella wouldn't be able to miss it when she twisted the lid off.
I've had a crush on you since the first day we met and you said that you'd sell your soul to the Devil for an Orange Crush pop. But I'd still love you if you'd said you liked Cream Soda better. Go out with me?
-Tess
She put the bottle in Nella's locker right before her last class so that it wouldn't be awkward at lunch if Nella wasn't interested. Tessa had a spare period during last class, so she could go home early, but she always waited to give Nella a ride.
It was raining and Tessa sat on the hood of her car and waited. She loved the rain. Lying flat on the hood, she let it soak her body. The metal felt warm against her cooling skin. The smell of rain on warm asphalt relaxed her and the way her wet dress clung to her chest and legs made her feel as if she was naked.
Tessa imagined as if she was part of the storm, and that as the rain fell, it released everything she had endured. The clouds were her skin. The lightning was her veins, and the world was her bones. She felt invincible, but in Nella's presence, all she could do, like the rain, was fall for her.
She almost didn't hear someone approach her car.
"You could get hit by lightning," Nella said.
"I'm willing to risk it," Tessa replied. She sat up and drank in Nella's appearance as if she hadn't just seen her an hour ago. Nella wore a green t-shirt that said: I'm not weird. I'm limited edition. And a pair of faded, holey, high-rise shorts that were probably her mom's from the 80s. She held a half-drank bottle of Orange Crush in her hand. Tessa swallowed nervously and slid off the car.
She got into the driver's side and turned on the air conditioning. Nella slipped into the car too. Neither spoke. Nella stared at the bottle and the note. Tessa looked over at her friend. Then Nella started laughing. "Cream Soda? Don't insult me," she said before leaning towards Tessa for a kiss. It was tender and it tasted of Orange Crush. Tessa couldn't have asked for anything more from her first kiss.
When the girls pulled away they smiled. Nella's teeth were slightly orange. They shared the rest of the pop as they drove around the city. It started to pour the kind of rain that the sewers can't keep up with. When they got hungry, they stopped for fish and chips. The rain continued its constant patter on Tessa's car as the girls ate their supper in the secluded parking lot of a small park.
Nella traced the drips on the window with her fingertips. Then she kicked off her shoes, opened the door, and ran out into the shower. The parking lot was slowing filling with water. Tessa followed Nella, and both girls began running through the warm water, kicking it into the air, and splashing each other. Once Nella was completely soaked, she stopped splashing Tessa and stood ankle-deep in the water with her lips quirked in a mischievous grin. Then she began taking off her clothes right in front of Tessa. She flung her t-shirt, shorts, and underwear on the hood of Tessa's car. Embarrassed, Tessa looked away from Nella to the clothes as they splatted onto the metal.
Nella hopped through the water over to Tessa, and put her finger on Tessa's chin. "Don't be embarrassed. I want you to see me," she said, guiding Tessa's gaze to her face.
The humidity in the air made Nella's hair puff out around her head like a lion's mane. She began backing away from Tessa, but didn't take her amber eyes off of the girl. Suddenly Tessa found the space between her and Nella unbearable. Even clothes would inhibit her craving of closeness. She pulled off her dress and underwear and ran to catch up to Nella.
The grass at the back of the park hadn't been cut yet that year. The two girls ran and leaped through it until they were panting and the wild snapdragon petals were sticking to their shins with rainwater. Tessa had finally caught up. Nella threw back her head and let loose such a loud, wonderful laugh that Tessa began laughing too. Tessa thought Nella's laugh was the most perfect thing she had ever heard. It dripped with honesty and seemed to soothe any misgivings she previously had.
"When you laugh, everything goes from hard to the easiest thing in the world," Tessa said.
Nella closed the space between them in one step. She put her arms around Tessa and relished the feeling of Tessa's rain-slicked skin pressed to hers. Every breath they took their chests connected momentarily until the next inhale. Nella buried her face into the corner of Tessa's neck and rubbed her wet cheek on Tessa's shoulder. Despite their shared warmth, goosebumps trailed up Tessa's spine. She wrapped her arms around Nella too and tried to memorize the feel of the girl's body.
They were silent. Tessa saw a small furrow on Nella's forehead. "What are you thinking?" she asked.
"Your heart, it sounds like the metronome I use for piano lessons," Nella said slowly. "Ever since I met you I've always used the sound to stay on track. I couldn't imagine a day where I didn't hear it. I always fear that I'll forget its tune if we were ever left each other."
"What would happen if you forgot its tune?" Tessa asked.
Nella's embrace tightened around Tessa's arms. "I think my heart would forget to learn to beat. The rhythm and pacing would go all wrong. It would be like drinking flat Orange Crush."
Tessa made a face. "We'll never leave each other," she said.
"How can you be sure?" Nella asked, almost desperately.
Tessa blinked away the droplets clinging to her eyelashes. She moved her head and kissed Nella's neck lightly. "Every time I kiss you, my heart stops momentarily, and you still remember its rhythm when it starts up again. I have faith that you'll remember me."
Nella nodded and was so overcame with the heady feeling of their new found love, that she gave a shout, lifted Tessa into the air, and twirled her around. When they stopped spinning, she hugged the girl tightly again. "I can't seem to get close enough," Nella mumbled. Her voice was muffled by the proximity of Tessa's skin to her lips.
The rain became a light mist and the sky began to darken into night. The girls ran to the car and melted into each other's arms like the sticky, sweet syrup at the end of an Orange Crush can left out in the sun.
