i hate feeling like I'm crazy.
maybe it's bc I'm on meds
but I hate feeling like something is wrong with me
maybe you made me feel this way
it's hard to look at you some times
knowing all the things you've said
yknow you are supposed to support me and not tear me down
but I love you so much and I don't wanna lose you
is that wrong?
I get weak in the knees and I have this gross pit in my stomach that seems endless
I sweat at the thought of people.
talking to them
meeting them
walking beside them
even making eye contact
so what is wrong with me?
why can't I be normal?
I understand that this disease is common
I used to not be like this
I was full of life and happiness
maybe the things that happened this year just triggered it
will it go away?
will I always be like this?
my mom found out I stopped
stopped taking my meds
I feel she's disappointed in me
or angry
I feel bad
i know she just wants to help
but it's hard.
bc I don't want to take them
I wanna get better
but not like this
I just wish I didn't have this stupid
illness
my best friend wrote this and it's beautiful. enjoy darlings.
