Nick woke up the next day feeling light-headed. He forgot where he was, but one thing was for sure: he needed to pee. Nick tried getting out of bed but something was holding him down, he turned his head to the side and he remembered everything.
He and Kevin had sex.
"Oh shit" Nick thought
Suddenly all the events of last night flooded back into his mind. "Shit shit shit" He said as he untangled himself from Kevin's embrace, picked up his clothes from the floor and ran to the bathroom.
He immediately locked the door to the bathroom and just stared at himself in the mirror. He was panicked but at the same time he was happy. He remembered how careful Kevin was with him. How Kevin cared about him. How Kevin didn't want him to get hurt. But most of all, how Kevin seemed to love him.
Nick has been feeling something for Kevin. But he didn't know what it was. Now he did, he was madly in love with Kevin and it excited him to know that there was a possibility that Kevin felt the same way.
Nick smiled and washed his face.
_
Kevin woke up with an enormous headache.
He remembered everything, how he and Nick finally made love. What Kevin has been wishing for since forever, he finally got. Kevin was gonna kiss Nick but when he turned to face Nick, he wasn't there.
Kevin frowned but then he heard the running sink in the bathroom.
"He was going to make a run for it" Kevin thought "He regretted last night" Kevin wanted to cry. Last night were one of the happiest nights of his life and it hurt that it didn't feel that way to Nick.
"What am I supposed to do?" Kevin thought again. He felt as if he had force Nick into this and Nick obliged because Kevin was drunk. Then an idea popped into Kevin's head "I could make it look like I forgot what happened, so nothing has to be awkward between us, we don't have to explain anything to each other, that night could be easily erased" But would Kevin be able to do that? He shared something very special with Nick, could he go back hiding his feelings for Nick like he did before? He couldn't, but he would do it, for Nick.
Kevin sat up and waited for Nick to come out of the bathroom. "You can do this Kevin" He repeated over and over.
-
Nick got dressed and finally got out of the bathroom. He was all smiles and he was ready, ready to admit his feelings to Kevin and ready for a level-up in their relationship. Nick saw Kevin sitting up and he immediately went to Kevin and sat down next to him.
"Hey Kevin!" He said happily.
"Hey Nick, thanks for taking care of me last night, must have been hectic for you"
Now Nick was confused "What?"
"Well I got drunk and you took care of me, thanks man, I don't know what I'd do without you"
"Is that all you remember?" Nick frowned
"Yeah, unless I did something really wild like moon someone on the street?"
Nick wanted to cry. Last night felt like they proclaimed their love for each other, but apparently it wasn't that big of a deal as Kevin forgot about it.
Nick coughed "Uhm, nah man, nothing too crazy. You just went straight to sleep after I put you on the bed"
"After you started attacking me with those lips of yours" Nick thought while licking his lips to the memory of Kevin's lips on his.
Kevin stood up and patted Nick on the shoulder "I said this earlier, I don't know what I'd do without you man, thanks"
Nick just smiled at Kevin.
Kevin was trying to study Nick's face. Trying to predict what he was thinking or feeling. Kevin couldn't name it, maybe Nick was relieved to not have to think and talk about us having sex last night? Yeah that's probably it
"I gotta take a shower, I reek and we have that interview in a few hours. I'm okay now, so you can go back to your room and get ready or get some sleep, I know I was a handful last night"
"Wow, Kevin is throwing me out, in a polite way, what a way to boost my ego" Nick thought
Nick forced a smile "Yeah buddy, do what you have to do"
Nick waited for Kevin to enter the bathroom so that he wouldn't see the tears that were falling on Nick's cheeks.
"How could I be so terribly wrong?" He thought to himself while crying.
He ran to his room, locked the door and crashed on his bed.
"How could something that amazing, hurt this bad?" Nick thought while holding his chest.
"You don't love him Nick, you don't" He repeated over and over.
"Why is my life shit? I just want to love, and I want someone to love me back, is that too much to ask for?"
Nick suddenly remembered what happened last night, the very reason why he went to Kevin's room in the first place.
-flashback-
He went to fetch Marcie, he knocked on the door yet no one answered. He had keys to Marcie's place (like she had a card key at the hotel he was staying at) and he let himself in. He couldn't find Marcie downstairs so he decided to go upstairs. He was halfway up the stairs when he heard her voice. "I'll surprise her" Nick thought but when he listened further he learned that Marcie was on the phone. He stood outside her door waiting to surprise her after she put down the phone.
"Nick? Yeah we have a date, he's picking me up in a few minutes. Ah don't worry, he's paying" She laughs then continues "He pays for everything, I've got him wrapped all over my finger, imagine if he were married, how rich I'd be" She laughs.
Nick just stood there with his mouth open, he couldn't believe it. He thought that she was the one. The one who loved him for him. Who loved him because he was Nick Carter, and not because he was Nick Carter from the Backstreet Boys. But instead of feeling sadness and hurt, he felt mad. He wanted to punch something, he wanted her to feel sorry for playing with him. But he had to be the bigger person. He went back downstairs, but the keys that she gave him on the table and he went out. On his way out he spotted the card key to his hotel that he had given her, he grabbed that, made his way out of the house, and drove away.
He gripped the steering wheel really tight and thought "Kevin, go to Kevin, he'll make this better, he'll make this anger go away, he'll make me better, he always does"
-end of flashback-
Nick laughed while his tears were still falling.
"Kevin will make me better?" Nick laughs to himself "That's a sick joke"
Until eventually, he cried himself to sleep.
-
Kevin was taking a shower when he thought "Please God, please let me know I have done the right thing. Because honestly, I don't think I did."
"What if I did the wrong thing?" Kevin said out loud "This would wreck him, and it would all be my fault"
Kevin loved Nick. Loved him more than he loved himself. Kevin would do anything for Nick. If Nick asked him to jump from the Empire State Building, he'd do it. Being the cause of Nick's destruction would kill Kevin.
YOU ARE READING
Beautiful
FanfictionKevin is in love with Nick. Should he act on his feelings or should he keep them a secret? Little does he know, Nick also feels something for Kevin, he just doesn't know whether or not it's good or bad.
