What Happened to Us?

Chapter Twenty Five

(Katherine's POV)

When I see Lauren let Christina pull her into her arms...my first thought is

Why would she do that?

I mean my first thought should be relief...because that means she forgives all of us right?

But...I don't want her to forgive me.

Well, of course I want to fold my baby sister into my arms and never let her go...of course I want her to forgive me.

But I don't deserve to be forgiven.

I don't deserve to touch her.

Or say that I love her.

She is too good for me...

So before she can look at me, before she can even acknowledge the fact that I'm in the room..I run.

I run down the hall, giving hasty apologizes to the other patients that I narrowly miss, to the nearest bathroom.

I slam the door, lock it behind me and slide down to the floor.

I bring my knees up to my chest and cry, cry from happiness, and guilt, and sadness all at once.

Aching for relief, for closure, I fish out my wallet from my back pocket and feel through the folds of its pockets until I graze something cold and sharp.

I curl my fingers around it pull out the small razor clip that I've begun to carry around with me.

Just a precaution.

I roll up my sleeve, and inhale sharply.

The sight of my arm is horrendous...and right now, I almost want to puke at the sight of it.

There are so many cuts, so many scars.

..but what harm could a few more do.

Just as I go to touch the blade to my skin, there's a knock at the door.

"Hello?" I hear a voice call.

I freeze, and instantly slip the razor back into it's secure place.

I yank down my sleeve and wipe the remaining tears from my face, before unlocking the door and pulling it open.

Standing before me, is a petite girl with dark hair, looking no more than Lauren's age.

"Hi I'm sorry, I was just leaving" I say, my even voice betraying my torn up emotions inside.

"Are you ok?" She asks, looking up at me with slight concern.

"I'm fine, my sister just woke out of her coma so, just a little emotional" I say, flashing a smile, carved to convince.

She stares at me a little longer, as if wondering whether or not to believe me.

But after another moment of silence, she nods.

"My sister just got diagnosed with cancer...liver cancer. The doctor said she's probably got about a year to live, tops...so..I feel your pain"

She says this, however, with such indifference. The same way one might say "I'm here for my yearly physical".

It stuns me for a moment.

"I'm so sorry" I say, hanging my head slightly with sympathy.

She shrugs her shoulders

"It's ok, I'll manage" she says, her tone once again impassive.

"I'm Nikki by the way" she adds.

"I'm Katherine, nice to meet you" I say, my smile tugged tightly at my lips.

She smiles back, and her gaze drops for a minute.

Suddenly I see her eyebrows knit together, and her head slowly lifts so that her eyes meet my own.

They're a warm shade of brown, the kind that reflect the season of late autumn, and they're filled with concern.

I look down to where her gaze was and see the hem of the sleeve of the flannel shirt I'm wearing is unbuttoned, revealing a small sliver of my heavily scarred wrist.

"If it's any consolation" she says, "I used to struggle with it too, it's like a drug...addicting. But when I finally stopped, it was like a huge weight lifting off my shoulders."

She makes a face "it sucks always having to hide scars"

I sigh heavily "I don't know..it just feels like I'm stuck at rock bottom"

At this she smiles.

"Hey, once you've hit rock bottom...you can only go up from there"

I smile back, a real smile. And this time it comes easily.

"I think Lauren would like you" I say.

"Let me know if she ever needs someone who...well, gets it"

"Thanks Nikki, send my regards to your sister as well"

She nods and smiles widely, a smile that somehow makes the world seem like less of a horrible place.

"I will".

With that said, we say our goodbyes, and I walk back to Lauren's room with my heart a million times lighter in my chest.

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A/N: YAY! ANOTHER UPDATE!!

I hope you guys like this one, decided to give Katherine a little perspective.

Now...how is Lauren gonna react to seeing the others

Mwahaha you'll find out soon ;)

Love yall!!

- Annie :)