43 Makes me sick

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I'm NOT hungry.
Why can't you understand?!
Have you even seen me lately?
I make myself sick!
With every stupid letter
In every single syllable
In every deplorable word
That I say...
That I make someone hear
Or read
Or feel...

I hate the feeling I get
When my smile fades from you
Because I know what I've just done
And I know I could have just done
something else.
But I didn't.

This self control that I lack
It makes me sick.
So don't tell me I need to eat.

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