Never Ending Search
What's the use of trying,
to be a friend at all?
Most people will ignore the nice,
push hard until you fall.
I'm tired of being hurt again,
again, again, again, again.
Once more I crawl inside my hole,
to drink the soured cup of end.
I raise a toast to misery,
to shallowness, contempt, and lies,
I sharpen knife that stabbed so deep,
to cut those anguished jealous cries,
I take that vow of lonliness,
which frees the one's I never named.
Don't worry, I'll not dare to speak,
so no one knows just who I blamed.
It's one thing saying no to he,
who tries to ask for friendship's love.
But acting like a friend when,
silent whispers give a shove.
I've found is most despicable.
Making love intent to hurt,
grinding down with guilty heel,
life's shallow path worn in the dirt.
I weep at this rejection's feel,
No longer wanting to be here and now.
So with that take a final lasting bow.
Curtain closes lifelong stage with no encore.
To those who poked their sticks,
I'm always never, not, no more.
Yet all will dream, my jagged screams.
wake up in sweat of ghastly things,
with nightmares caused by slamming final door.
This dark side lives forever,
tear stained memories of never,
filled with coinship, pulled the lever,
for the slot to give till sore.
Those haunting cries of lonliness,
will echo in their empty hearts,
they'll see my boat depart for distant shore.
In quest of love's lost treasure,
buried down inside the core.
wading out the shallows for the deep,
I gently drift off to sleep.
JERKED AWAKE,
I rise to start the search once more.
