September 2020 Issue
CITIZENS!
It has been one year since our inaugural edition of this newspaper, the first and only produced in the New City.
The paper and pencils we found in abundance in the basement of Brooklyn College will last us for years if you folks continue to share your copy of this tabloid with your friends and neighbors.
This month’s edition spotlights a wedding on Saturday, September 4th.
It will take place on Staten Island at The Dragon’s Lair Reception Hall at 1PM.
Wil Abbotamarco, son of Berto Abbotamarco, will marry Tu Wan Snow, daughter of John Snow, better known as SnowXX, the acknowledged leader of the Manhattan Black Muslims.
The Groom’s Uncle, Fredo Abbotamarco, the chief of the Italian clans of South Brooklyn, will be one of the many important Brooklyn figures who will act as ushers. Perhaps the most prominent usher being Malcolm Xavier Brown, Wil’s Godfather and the most influential Black leader in both Brooklyn and liberated Queens.
The Maid of Honor, Carmellita Badillo, hails from North Brooklyn. She is a distant relative of the Puerto Rican Headman. Unfortunately, El Hefty will be unable to attend. He is recovering from an acute gout attack. In his place, Enrico Santiago will chaperone Carmellita, in addition to heading up the Puerto Rican delegation.
Father Ian O’Dale of BayRidge will help officiate at the wedding along with Rabbi Randolf Sanders, of BoroPark. Mullah Abdulla a-Ben Gada will not be able to attend. However, he will send his prayers and his blessings.
Both families have asked MasterPoe Tze Dong to perform the actual wedding.
He is a respected friend of all Middangard.
Additional ushers include:
JohnsonX of Manhattan, SnowXX’s right hand man.
Red O’Campbel, Brother of Wil’s Mother, from Brooklyn’s WestEnd; A distant cousin of the famous Shamus O’Campbel.
Gene [Dancer] Kelly, everyone’s favorite Irishman from Red Hook.
Tomaso Abbotamarco, Wil’s cousin and son of Alfredo Abbotamarco.
Bobio Abbotamarco, Wil’s cousin and Tomaso’s younger brother.
The Best Man, Luke Chenko, hails from Coney Island which, as everyone knows, is fondly referred to as Little Russia.
A good time will be had by all, I am sure.
This is your reporter, editor and publisher Randolf Sanders signing off until next month.
Remember, never travel alone. The Goblers are still out there.
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