Flames of Courage Stand alone book

CH 12 Healing

Masen's POV-

I feel like I'm going to scream at the top of my lungs if Blake doesn't stop right this instant. It's been three weeks since he found me and Blake is handling me with kid gloves still. I feel like the sooner everyone stops looking at me with pity in their eyes and asking if I'm ok every five minutes they might just see it for themselves. I'm FINE.

I can't say the same for my dad he has taken a leave of absence from work because I can't work so he promised to take care of me but honestly I think he did it because he was scared. And at this point everyone is just driving me crazy with their concern. I just want to get back to normal.

They don't leave me alone for one damn second. When Blake leaves for work in the morning my dad shows up to take over babysitting duties. Some days he brings gramps with him others it's just him. It was ok at first I liked having the company but now I want to shoot my own dad.

I sigh as Blake gets out a bed without even kissing me. That's another thing that is driving me crazy Blake won't even kiss me now. He thinks I need to heal from my trauma but it all reality it's just making everything worse every time he holds back I feel a little more damaged and unrepairable.

I watch as Blake closes the bathroom door to take a shower before heading to work while grumbling under my breath. "Oh no Mas I couldn't possible kiss you. Ugh I should have stayed with Will he was crazy but at least he wanted me."

I guess I was being kind of loud because Blake slams the door open letting it ricochet off the wall. "Really Masen that is so fucking wrong on so many levels."

I sit up in bed. "Well it's the fucking truth, every since I got home from the hospital you won't even look at me let alone touch me it's driving me fucking insane. If you think I'm damaged goods just say so. FUCK!!!"

Blake sits on the edge of the bed and his whole body drains of his anger as he puts his heads in his hands. "I'm sorry Masen. I really am. I just don't know how to handle all of this."

I sigh and plop back on the bed feeling completely exhausted. "Blake I understand just go and don't come back it's only making things worse for me." It's probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do but I can't keep living like this.

If I don't move on I will go crazy. I don't want to give Will any more space in head. I'm tired of him occupying my brain. I want peace from the whole damn thing.

I just want to get back to normal before everything happened and Blake is preventing that. Blake stands and looks at me for a long time. "Is that what you really want Mas?" I can hear the sadness in his voice but it doesn't change my resolve.

I nod before rolling over and giving him my back. I can't watch him leave it will kill me. I hear rustling as Blake gets dressed and then the bed dips as Blake kisses the top of my head. "I'm so sorry Mas."

I sigh before rolling over. "Can't you just let it go? I have. Why are you and dad so caught up in it still? It happened to me not you two for fucks sake."

Blake sits back with a raised eyebrow. "Yes Mas the unspeakable happened to you and you know who was there after the fact feeling useless and helpless at the same time. Me your parents and gramps. We have to live with the fact it took us so long to find you and we had to live with the thought that you could be dead and we could be doing all that work in vain just to find your bloody corpse so no this did not just happen to you it happened to all of us and we all have to cope and live with it in our own way. "