Trust life a little (Completed)

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"Get the hell up!" Kristina screams at me while i am on the floor crying.

I got up whimpering in fear like a puppy. She slapped me repeatedly and screamed profanities at me while i just tried my hardest to not cry even more. I heard the bell ring and Kristina just threw her homework at me. I picked up her homework and my book bag. I had to get to class before i get late. I put on my hoodie and ran to class. There was barely anyone in the halls and i was late as usual. I bumped into a guy and he just snickered at me while i ran off, wiping my tears off my face.

Why? Why me? What have i done? I just don't understand why Kristina does this. She used to be a really good friend in middle school and i thought she would be the same. But no she became a monster. I said hi once and that was the last time i ever spoke in school. She looked to her 'friends' and slapped me because i was 'too weird and ugly to talk to her'. She has been beating me ever since. I can't stop it, it just continues happening even though i try.

Lately i have been thinking that maybe it was my time. You know just to end it. The only thing that is keeping me on this green planet are my parents. All my siblings are older so they are either married or in college. I am the only one that has stuck with my parents and i don't know what they would do if i was gone. Their big old hearts would just shatter, i imagine. I can't let that happen, so i continue living my terrible life as a victim.

Oh no everyone is staring. I walk past all their desks and sit in the farthest chair that is near the back window. I got stares from everyone but Mr. Flecker didn't even notice and care. I like math and all but its just hard to understand anything he says since he is Indian. I take out a note book and start copying the math problems that are on the board. Ugh his voice is just so confusing. I swear i will fail this marking period.

Right when i was going to take out my book to read, someone slams the door open. Its the same guy that bumped into me, or should i say Mr. Perfect. He was Kristina's boyfriend but he didn't act like it. I've heard rumors that he has cheated on her at least 30 times or more. That's why he sits with the cool people at lunch, whereas i am sitting in the table nearest to the exit, by myself. You know why i sit close to the exit. Because i feel like Kristina will start something with me and i need a quick get away.

"Are you staring or just confused?," Kristina said as she snapped me out of my thoughts.

I put my head down on the table in embarrassment. I could hear Kristina snicker while the rest of the class laughed with her. Ugh, not again. When will she just leave me alone? Oh I know, never. She will never care enough to stop. I have to do something about it and quick. After school i will end it. No one will care for too long. My parents are bound to forget after a week. I know that this is the typical thing a girl like me will say but I don't care.

Oh i know how i'm going to do this. I will hang myself. Ooo on the tree in the middle of the park. Everyone will see how mistaken they were. I know where to get what i need and my parents will let me roam free because they don't care. The only thing is that i can't back out. I have to end the tourture. This will all end but i just have to act like nothing is happening. Well act like my normal self then. Yeah perfect cover. No one will notice.

Ding! Ding!

I lifted my head to see that everyone was getting up and getting ready for lunch since we always had math before lunch. I put away all my stuff in my bag and got up keeping my head low so nobody would notice me. I got out of there quickly but the next conquest was to get to the lunch room without getting trampled. I got pushed around but ended up getting to my class just looking over the homework that i 'need' to do. I could just leave but no, i have to give everyone the chance to at least say something that will help me feel better.

But as always i hope and no one comes over to the table. I quietly sat there just staring at the clock. Just waiting for me to be free. i glance over to the rest of the kids and see that a guy across the room was staring and i just put my head on the table. I found my phone ding and it was only my mom. I thought she would say something positive but she just texted about my dirty room.

Ugh. They just want me to end it. They don't even care enough to realize that i'm dying inside. I don't get a sympathy vote from anyone. Why should I? I shouldn't. I don't matter. Not to the students, to my parents, or to the world.

Ding! Ding!

I'm free!! I can do this now. I got up so fast that i felt a little light headed but continued to walk towards the exit. I should of ate. No, i don't have to because i won't need it in my system in a couple of minutes. I bumped into some people when i picked up my stuff. I could see the exit. Its so close. I walked faster and faster and finally got outside. I looked around and made sure that Kristina wasn't there. I need to make sure nothing stops me from this goal that i have set. I walked to my house, which was only three minutes away.

I opened the door to see my mom standing there with an angry expression. I pushed past her and ran up to my room. I dropped my stuff and found a rope that i kept under my bed. I told you i was thinking about this and now it will happen. I will be free from the devil. I took a bunch of papers and a pen from my book bag. I picked up all my stuff and went down the ladder that i had set up a couple of days ago. I found myself walking towards the park.

It was just so beautiful. I'm glad that i get to end it on a nice day. I walked to the park and sat under the tree and started to write my note. I wrote about how terrible Kristina was to me, how i was invisible, how i didn't matter, and that i was tired of life. A tear ran down my face and i wiped it away while looking up to the sky. I could see it was getting dark so i wrapped the rope on the tree and stood up on the trunk that was near it. I looked around and picked up the note. I taped it to the tree and put my neck through the slip.

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