Trust life a little (Completed)

19-The Woman That Might Love Me

I'm pacing back and forth in my room practically pulling out my hair at what he said. Who the hell does he love? Who could steal his heart? Oh i already know, Kristina. Of course it would be her, right? She is 'perfect' in every sense, so it must be her. Jake and her did date and probably are back together by the way he loves her. That's it i have to stop caring. He has flipped my world upside down and then back. Well no more. He will not play with my emotions like that. Plus i have a boyfriend that loves me. I don't need the confusing Jake, I need the perfectly handsome Michael. My little prince. I jump onto my bed, laying on my back, thinking about my prince, my king, my everything. He is the one that i should give my love and caring for, not Jake. You know what, I am going to call him and ask him about his wonderful day and such. 

I picked up the phone from my side and sat up. I unlocked my phone and opened up my contacts. I searched for Michael and then hesitated. Why am I hesitating? Just call him! Then my doubts kicked in. What if he doesn't want to talk to me? What if he is too busy for me? Oh god maybe he is cheating on me right now. I lock my phone and put it down besides me. I curl up and it happens again. Memories, flashing. Jake's blood! Michael's frown when i ran out of the theater. Ethan and Alexander scared faces. The trunk below me. The rope tied around the tree. The rope in my hands. The anxiety builds up and I closed my eyes, trying to shake away the memories.

Make it stop! Please just kill me now! My breathing quickens and i panic. Not again. Please God, no. I run into the hallway and frantically run into the bathroom. I lock the door behind me and turn on the sink. Water please make it go away. I splash myself with the water and i realize it isn't helping. I look up into the mirror and see my horrified face.  I hear this voice scream at me, "Your going crazy! Your nuts! Your a freak! Your Suicidal!" I put my hands to my head and whispered, "Shut Up, Shut Up, Shut Up, Shut Up." I backed into the door and sat down against it. I started to breath normally and felt a bit of relief. I'm fine.

I got up and unlocked the door. Once i got out of the bathroom i could see all three of my brothers sticking their heads out of their room. I looked at them and said, "I don't want to talk about it." 

Chase and Gregory started to peek their heads away but Cameron came out of the room. He stood in front of me with his arms crossed. It looked like he wasn't pleased with what i just said. I heard a whimper from my door and realized it was Bubbles. Bubbles ran up to me and i picked him up. I faced my attention to Cameron and he sternly said, "You, me, and our brothers are going to talk about what's happening..." I was about to interject but he said, "and i don't care if you don't want to." I huffed and walked into my brother's room. I could see clothes everywhere and three beds that were spread out in the room. Cameron closed the door behind us and Chase and Gregory looked up. They were laying in each of their beds and using their phones until i walked in. 

i nervously said, "Hey, guys."

They waved at me, confused at why i was there. Cameron walked in front of me and sat down on his bed. I stood there until Cameron said, "Pick a bed."

I looked around and decided to sit the closets to the door, so i sat with Chase. I sat with my back against the wall and started to pet Bubbles. He started to squirm so i lightly giggled. Chase randomly asked, "So what was that whole scene?"

I turned my attention up and saw that each of them were facing me, listening intently. I looked from Bubbles to Chase and said, "I don't know?"

Gregory said, "Have you had any problems at school?" I looked up to him shocked at the question. 

"With boys?", Chase intervened. I looked back at Chase and felt like there was nothing i could say to make them steer from the problem. I don't want to talk about it was the line that shut this situation up but now it didn't work.