The Beats In Rift

Chapter 11

Meadow

I AVOIDED ANY interaction with Jared. It was difficult because he was determined to talk to me. He stared at me over dinner, making it impossible to eat. He watched every move I made and so did Justin; it was so hard to be around them both. Can you love two people at once? Can you need love from two people? Can you ever move on from your first love?

The more time Jared spent at the house, the more Rift I could see in him. He was still passionate, funny, intense, dedicated to music. But he was also different. He was tougher, he had a harder edge then he used to. He seemed way older than his years, like he had grown up much sooner than the rest of us. He had life experience. I so wanted to know where he had been. What he had been doing all this time. But I was too afraid to speak to him in front of Justin.

It's been two weeks since Jared got back and tonight is the first time we've been alone.

He wastes no time cornering me in Justin's room.

"You can't avoid me forever, Beats. I'm not leaving until we have this talk."

He's so close I can smell his body wash. God, he smells good. Memories of us flood my mind and I look over to the wall where he took me. He follows my gaze and steps closer. "What are you thinking about, Beats?"

His voice drips with seduction, my heart rate accelerates.

"Nothing," I whisper.

"That's a lie and you know it. I can make that memory more vivid for you if you like?" He's so close his breath is burning my skin.

"Back off, Jared. Don't you care about Justin?" I try to appeal to the brother side of him because I'm so weak I don't know if I can tell him no if he pushes me any further.

He steps back. "He took what was mine." He sounds so deadly serious my eyebrows pinch together.

"You left me. You left me in a heap on my mother's floor, Jared. I would have never made it without Justin. He made me breathe again." The pain is back in his eyes, but I keep going. "You didn't even give me a chance to explain."

"What was there to explain? You knew Dad was fucking around with your mother and you kept it from me. My Mom was a mess. He beat her, did you know that? He would do it in places that wouldn't show. He told her he was fucking your Mom, he tortured her with details, sent her into a depression so bad that she was practically comatose for ages. He threatened her to keep her quiet."

Warm salty wetness seeps onto my lips. I'm crying and I hadn't even noticed.

"I had to get her away, Beats. She told me she had been following your Mom; she wanted to see what that woman had that she didn't."

"You could have talked to me. You destroyed me when you left."

"I was so mad at you, and then my Mom talked about how much your Mom had ruined her, and it made me angrier with you for keeping it a secret, for lying to me. As time passed I tried to convince myself we were young and it was a puppy love we could move on from, but I couldn't move on. Thoughts of you consumed me. Memories of us were what kept me sane while I tried to look after Mom. I was planning on getting settled down and coming to talk to you. It had been four months, and I decided to charge my old phone and found texts from Melissa, telling me you'd moved on. I phoned her and she told me you were dating Logan from the football team. She said you were rebelling, going from one player to the next. I didn't believe her so I drove into town and there you were at a game, wearing preppy clothes, cheering for Logan and it broke my fucking heart. I didn't want to believe it Beats, but my Dad and his hateful words echoed in my mind along with my Mom's and I just..."