-lucas-
Shawn and Katy came over the next day with Rosie. They both looked exhausted, but happy to have her.
Mr. Matthews talks to me at breakfast while everyone mingled at their living room.
"Topanga told me what Maya and Josh had asked of you and Riley. Will you two be going through with it? I know your relationship hasn't been great since you two broke up."
"I think we are. This is what Maya and Josh wanted for Rosie so we can't really refuse. I really want to be in better terms with Riley, too, so this could be good for us."
"Have you talked about it? You don't want to rush into this, Lucas. If your relationship isn't civil by the time you have Rosie, it won't be good for her."
"I know, Mr. Matthews. I've tried to talk to her, but you know your daughter..." I told him before I glanced at her with Rosie.
Josh and Maya weren't wrong, she would be a great mother, but I don't know if I'd be the chosen father for that family.
"Go to them, Lucas. They're going to be your future." Mr. Matthews put his hand on my shoulder to encourage me.
I have no clue what Riley thought of me right now, but what I do know is that I've never stopped loving her.
I stood up to sit with them at the couch, where Rosie was babbling about her night with her grandparents while laying on Riley's lap.
"Can I sit with you guys?" I asked.
"Of course, Uncle Lucas!" The two-year old said before transferring onto my lap.
Rosie had most of Maya's features and most of Josh's personality. She had always been very personable and cheeky like Josh. But her and Maya had the same blue eyes and bright smile. She had the best parts of both of her parents, and looking at her made me miss them more. I can't even imagine how Riley feels right now.
"I see how it is, Rosie. I guess Auntie Riley isn't good enough for you anymore." Riley pouted.
"No, Auntie Riley!! You and Uncle Lukie are both my favourites!!" She exclaims before trying to hug us both.
Riley and I looked at each other before tickling the living daylights out of Rosie so we could hear Maya's laugh come out of her two-year old voice.
"Please stop!" She laughed.
We both stopped and kissed her on each of her cheeks.
"I love you, Uncle and Auntie."
"We love you too, little Peaches." Riley responds.
I was speechless with realization. Riley was the only person I can imagine a future with. Only Riley could be the mother of my child.
"Riles, can we talk?" I asked before Shawn whisks his granddaughter away while she giggles in his arms.
"We can talk at the bay window." She briefly looks at me and stands up from the couch with me in tow.
I follow her into her room where she sat and patted the space beside her where Maya used to sit.
The room felt cold and empty since Riley had moved out a few years ago. This room reminded me of my high school years where all our problems were solved, and where we were most comfortable.
"I know you think we should take Rosie." She starts.
"Yeah, I mean, that's what Josh and Maya would've wanted right?"
At the mention of their names, her head lowers.
"God, Riley. I can't even imagine being in your position right now."
I extended my arm to rub her shoulder and she starts to sob in my chest.
I held her close to me while she cried, knowing she needed this for herself.
"I just don't understand why they would leave me and then make me pretend to be them with her. They're supposed to be here for Rosie." She cried, "Maya left me alone with this stupid bay window where we were supposed to grow old and die. And Uncle Josh left me without a big brother. Why would they leave me, Lucas?" She looked up at me with her wet eyes and I didn't know what to say.
This was the worst I've seen her, and I don't blame her. She just lost two of the closest people to her. She must be devastated. But even at her worst, I saw her at her best. She was the most vulnerable, but I look at her like she's the strongest person -because she is.
"I don't know, Riley, but they love you and they're still here. And Rosie needs you..and me. She needs us to be there for her."
"She needs them. She needs to understand where her parents really are. I'm not going to pretend to be them with her, Lucas. I'm not."
"We're not going to pretend to be them, Riley. They're them. We're us. We are never going to be Josh and Maya. And we'll tell Rosie about her parents once she's at the right age, but she's only two right now, she can't understand everything yet. But we're not going to keep anything from her."
"I just want them back, Lucas." She cries into my chest.
"I know, Riles. Me too." I let her cry for a bit more then I take her face in my hands, "Look, Riley. I'm here for you all the time. I'll always be here for you. Because I've been in love with you, and I'll always be in love with you. And I swear that we'll go through this together, with Rosie, if you want us to. Just tell me how you feel about me."
"Lucas.." Her doe eyes stared at me, "I'm scared. I don't want us to be like we used to be."
"I would never hurt you like that again, Riley. Just tell me you want to be with me again."
"I do. You know I do. I've never loved anyone as much as I love you."
"Okay, then what's the problem?"
"This is a huge commitment, Lucas. What if we change our minds?"
"I'll never change my mind. You're my future, I'm sorry I didn't realize that soon enough."
We sat side by side, with my hand on top of hers like we did senior year when we decided to be together the second time since eighth grade.
"I think I'm ready to be with you, Lucas." She says before putting her hair behind her ear.
"Really?" My hopeful eyes search for hers.
That's when I knew I'd love her forever.
Even when we broke up at the same spot, I knew, that she'll always have most of my heart, even though we shattered each other's.
"It's okay, Lucas. I didn't either until now." She holds my hand and puts her head on my shoulder, "I missed you."
"I love you." I responded and she looked at me so I could see her grin.
I lifted her chin to lift her face so I could kiss her again after all these years.
"I love you too, subway boy. Let's go see Rosie." She said as she pulls me off of her bay window.
