Monsters Within

Chapter 20

I feel my head begin to ache and become blurry as I raise it. They hurry to my side as I open my eyes once more. And it's confirmed. The two people here are Nadia and Cole. Not Gale. Gale's not here. Or, maybe he's in the bathroom? Or getting food? Yes, that has to be it.

"Hey sweetie, don't get up yet, just wait a second." That's Nadia, as always sounding like a mother. I suppose that would make sense, my parental figures are terrible so of course my best friend would be a stand in for their incompetence. 

Then I look over to Cole. The concern in his eyes is there, and it nearly breaks my heart. I worried him, and even with this solution, I hurt him.

Yet here he his, one hand in mine, and the other on my face.

"You worried me so much." He says tears in his eyes. And then, I realize I also have tears in my eyes.

"I'm sorry." I say.

"Shh it's okay, don't worry about it, you're okay, which means I'm okay." And I see a tear slowly fall.

Then I say the single most stupid thing of all time in that moment.

"Where's Gale?"

And just like that the tears overflow and I see Cole holding back sobs. I saw his eyes, a light shattered within them. My mind seems unable to come up with words, so I simply wait for an answer. But it doesn't come from Cole, it comes from Nadia.

"Oh honey." She says, her eyes brimming with tears, and what's that look? Pity? Why? "I called him. I really did but..."

"He's here right? I mean he came. He came to see me. Right?" I fight to hold back a waterfall of tears.

"No sweetie, he's uh, he's not here." She continues.

"But he came, or he's getting food or something right?" I say as I begin to realize what she is trying to say. The pity intensifies as she sees I have realized this. "He's not coming. He never came. He didn't plan on it."

"I'm sorry hun, I called I really did. I told him what happened. But he said he wouldn't come. He said there was no way he could come. He said... Well he said he couldn't see you like this..." All I did was stare blankly for a while then I blinked and looked away. "I'm so sorry honey."

Then I look over to Cole. His eyes are red, big, and for some reason pleading and filled with a sadness unlike that of his reaction to my asking about Gale. It takes me a second but I figure out why they're pleading and sad.

"It was you." I say. Remembering the second pair of arms that held me that night. "First it was Nadia. She called you too. Didn't she?" I don't wait for a response but I see his eyes look back up at me. "It wasn't even a full minute. You were there in less than a minute. You came for me. Right away. Immediately once you knew." I say my eyes overflowing with tears, as I gaze into his eyes.

"I didn't know you even remembered that." He says quietly.

"You took off your sweatshirt. Wrapped it around me. You held me. I felt your tears fall on me. You kept me warm. You slowed the bleeding. When they put me in the ambulance you insisted you be allowed to come. As well as Nadia. They wouldn't allow it. You weren't family. But you didn't give up. And they let you come. You rode with me and even as they worked, you held my hand.

"It was you. It was always you." And I can tell he knows, as I do, that I meant more than that day. I meant always. Since we met. I just hadn't know then.

"I love you." He says, kissing my bandaged wrist. "I will always be there for you. Whatever happens, I'm there. I love you no matter what happens, no matter what you do. I will continue to love you."

And it dawns on me then as I sit, hands wrapped in his, the difference between him and Gale.

Gale needs me. And for the ones I love, I will always be there. So naturally I was there when he needed me. I was with him when he was sat in his room, blade in hand trembling. Of course I would've been. But when I needed him, he couldn't find the time, nor the courage to come.

I protected him, watched over him, was there for him. Always. But when I needed him, that changed. Never in his arms would I truly be safe.

Cole however was there. When I was chasing after Gale. When I was breaking down, being hurt by my father, or having a nightmare. He was there. And I, likewise, was there for him.

Suddenly I remember something Cole said. You can't protect someone from something inside them. And it makes me realize that though Cole thought this to be true, he still fought. Worked to protect me from myself. Something Gale never did.

"I love you too, Cole Daniel Jackson. And I will do so until the end of days." My voice is filled with the feeling I have for the boy I love.

"Awwwwwww this is too cute!!!" I hear Nadia practically screech. And I turn to face her a small smile on my face. "Sorry sorry, bad thing happened, now intimate moment, not the right time for this. I'll just leave you two alone."

"Don't be silly Nadia," I reply, "stay here it's fine."

"Oh I'll just be getting us food it'll take about ten minutes, is that long enough for you two lovebirds?"

"Yes I think so." I say laughing. And with that Nadia walks out of the room.

"You barely made it. The doctors said you were lucky. They said that I did a good job stopping the blood, but I merely did what my mother had taught me. I thought you weren't going to make it." Cole's eyes filled once more with worry. I leaned over to him despite the pain and kissed him, then keeping my face near his, spoke;

"I will never again leave you. I promise you that."