𝐇𝐀𝐙𝐀𝐑𝐃 │ 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐘𝐋 𝐃𝐈𝐗𝐎𝐍 ¹ [✔]

[42]: sophia

Shane stopped just at the break of trees, setting the bag on the ground so he could rummage through it. There was some rattling before he brought his hand away and offered me something.

My two guns. Two guns - I thought I'd lost one. Complete within their peeling holster.

"I dropped-- how?"

"You didn't drop it, I took it - I dropped mine," he admitted, standing up and hooking the bag over his shoulder so he could keep walking.

"Wait!" I called after him, having to walk at a fast pace to keep up wth his long strides. "What do you mean, you took it?"

"I mean that, ah, I dropped mine so I took one of yours - it wasn't a big deal."

Then something hit me. A realisation. I looked down to my hands to look at the gun, turning it over to inspect it.

"This," I swallowed. "This is the gun you killed Otis with." I didn't ask, I knew. I knew that the gun I held then was responsible for what happened.

If I hadn't brought my guns - maybe Shane wouldn't have the chance to use it? I wasn't sure.

I didn't feel bad, though. Not anymore; I had somehow moved on. The somehow being really unsure. Maybe if I were able to step back and look at my own self I could decipher exactly what was going on.

After a few moments, he finally answered my initial question; "We're gonna take the barn."

"Take the barn? Bu--but we need to be less extravagent with that."

"This is about strategy, thinking ahead."

"This would be strategy if it were more clever. We have to try and be clever."

"We don't have time to try and be clever, we have to be clever, now."

That made sense - thinking ahead was thinking now, in a sense. So I strapped the holster on myself, on top of my clothes for everyone to see clearly. There was no hiding it.

Soon enough, we walked far enough so that we could see the rest of thr group huddle around the front of the house. Daryl had thrown his arm in the air, exclaiming something I couldn't understand. Then he turned and spotted both Shane and I strutting towards them all. The bag of guns over Shane's shoulder kept knocking against my side, and it was started to tick me off.

Shane tore a large shotgun from the bag and handed it to me. He muttered under his breath, "Give that to him." I knew he was talking about the hunter who was making his own way over to us.

"What's all this?" Daryl pointed to us.

When he got close enough, I pushed the gun towards him.

"You with us, man?" Shane asked, waiting for him to grab it. When Daryl did he proceeded to hand out even more guns.

Even though I did agree that we needed to get rid of the problem, the barn full of walkers, I did feel nervous. I couldn't help it and I think it was mainly because I had a gun in my hands again. Having a gun in my hand gave me nervous itch on the back of my hand and the only way to scratch was to pull the trigger. But not if it wasn't pointed at something, anything.

And the thing was that I wanted to say - having these guns out and taking that barn was a one-way ticket away from the farm.

I just couldn't bring myself to think, "Don't do this, it'll make you be out there again."

"Time to grow up," Shane ordered. "You already got yours?"

"Yeah. Where's Dale?" Andrea inquired.