Ashes to Ashes

Ｃｈａｐｔｅｒ Ｎｉｎｅ

Chapter 9

-

"Must i paint you a picture?"

-

♣ Cola Maybel ♣

"No!" I screamed. "You can't do that."

Ash sighed exastbhratedly, rubbing his temples. "I'm sorry, Cola. But we just think it would be best if you took a break. At least until you get your strength up."

"I have got strength," I said stubbornly, crossing my arms over my chest. "You have to keep me, I don't have anywhere else to go." I gritted my teeth in embarrassment, hating that the statement was the absolute truth.

"I never said you had to leave, actually you can't go, you're just not allowed to work."

I made a muffled kind of grunt and when Ash didn't reply, I tried a different tactic. "You haven't got anyone else to fill my place, anyway."

Ash looked weary and tired. "Actually, we do. Her name is Lexi, Jax has just gone to pick her up from the airport."

"Oh right! You replaced me quickly!" I said hotly, feeling my temper rising even more. "So I'm that useless to you. Fine by me."

"Cola," Ash looked stressed. Obviously not caused by finding someone to replace me If he could do it that fast. "Don't take it that way, were only-"

"Well, there aren't any other ways to take it," I interrupted him, not caring in the slightest what he had to say, and stormed out of his office, slamming the door behind me.

Part of me, the sensible part, knew that I was totally overreacting and that Ash was doing it for the best, plus he had his reasons, I mean, I hadn't really been acting very resilient lately, so he did sort have a point.

But the other part of me, the one I actually listened to, said that he had absolutely no reason whatsoever to kick me out, I would be fine next time, and was only doing it because he was bored with me and this new girl, Lexi whatever, would be heaps better than I had ever been, even though I had never failed to do what Ash had told me, up until two nights ago at least, Ash would spend all his time focused on her and wouldn't even glance in my direction.

The thought made me insanely angry, though I didn't know why.

I leant against the stair banisters, suddenly exhausted. This was all my fault. Again. If I had just held it together, maybe he would have let me stay in the job. Kicking me out also meant I was out of the gang, although I wasn't even sure that I was in it to start with.

For the millionth time I wished Caitlyn was still here. She could always make me laugh, even when I was most upset. Always there by my side when anything happened, with a smile, a tight hug and words that never failed to make me forget whatever was wrong. That should have been my job. I was the older sister.

I guess that wasn't the only thing I couldn't do properly.

I signed. I need a drink.

No you don't, the sensible side of me says, and for once I listen to it, and turn to walk up the stairs.

+++

Lexi has been here for an hour now, briefly coming to dump her stuff in the room a few doors down from mine, making me scowl at the wall even more. Most of the time she was downstairs though, probably going over her new job, which she starts tonight. I knew this because I may or may not have been standing at the top of the stairs for around fifteen minutes listening to their conversations.