Sympathy, Anger, Hopeless

The morning after

WARNING THIS MAYBE TRIGGERING IN MANY WAYS IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE SUBJECTS LIKE RAPE, DEPRESSION, FOUL LANGUAGE, ECT. PLEASE DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER.

~3rd pov~

     Shizuo woke up like any other day, except the part that he had a Flea holding on for dear life to his body. Shizuo thought it was sad but looked cute too. How the raven boys cheeks were flushed red and snuggled close. He remembered what he'd said last night and hope for his life Izaya wasn't gonna ask about it when he woke up.
       Shizuo sighed slowly getting up doing his best not to wake the other. Once free he walked into Izaya's bath room searching for Izaya's self tools he found the soap box and four hidden pocket knives. Shizuo then search the living room, kitchen, and Izaya's office. The pile grew huge of these sharp objects the last room that needed to be checked out was Izaya's bedroom.
      Shizuo walked back in quietly searching, Izaya still sleeping after he found a dozen more pocket knives Shizuo had finished placing it all in one box. Looking at the box only worried if there were more and why so many? Shizuo place to box in an empty shelf in one of the kitchen cabinets. Shizuo began to make eggs and bacon and toast for breakfast when Izaya walked in.
      Izaya watched Shizuo cook breakfast, "Morning Shizu-chan~ wow you can cook? Thought you lived off of fast food."
       "Good morning, Izaya-kun. And yes, it's alright I'm not a great chef." Shizuo set the two plates of food down Izaya looking down begining to pick at the food angering Shizuo alittle more then he already was. "Eat Izaya it's good for you." Shizuo growled as the other male grabbed his fork taking a bite sarcastically.
      "Aww but, Shizu-chan I'm not hungry for breakfast, or food~"
       "Too bad eat it."
       "No. I tool a bite already."
       "Fine a deal, if you don't eat your food you don't get your knives back."
       "Huh, what do you? You took my knives from where?" Izaya patted the bottom of the table looking with fear. "Where did you put it!?"
        "Izaya I took them to my place you don't get the back until you behave. You better you and you get the knives"

~~Izaya's POV~~

      Them? Maybe he missed one he got pissed more and more thinking about it but refused to show Shizuo the satisfaction. He using my belonging against me in order to make me eat. Izaya ate his toast and eggs in silence then went to lay back down. Shizuo finished, cleaned up, then went in checking on Izaya who was crying silently in his bed sniffling here and there.
     Shizuo sat on the bed grabbing Izaya placing him in his lap. "I know you think this isn't fair that I took your stuff but, I don't want you hurting yourself anymore, I want you safe Izaya..." Shizuo paused debating with him self. "...I'm doing this, b-because I...I care about you Iz-izaya." Shizuo held Izaya trying not to make eye contact with Izaya his face slightly flushed.
      Izaya just laid there for alittle while holding onto shizuo then mumbling flushed,"I know you don't really. Your just saying that to make me feel better..."
       "I do Izaya, I wouldn't be here if I didn't, Shinra would still be doing a piss poor job at protecting you or some asshat would be usinging you." Shizuo side patting the males head looking over his arm.
         "So,... It happens. It's what I get for being a bad person. Karma as some people put it."
         "So you did shitty stuff doesn't mean you should have it tough left and right. I'm not saying you don't deserve things you get served sometimes but this, and Shiki aren't something you want or deserve in your life."
          "Whatever... What do I have to do to get my blades back, how much of it as well?" Izaya said leaning into the larger male wrapping his arms around him smirking like the old Izaya use to do all the time.
            "Hmmm well seems fair? You do have a lot of them for no reason. Swear to god this house was a trap in itself?"
             "I deal with Shiki, I work as and informat, and I purposely piss people off. I have them for me. But as for the deal I say. Every hmmmm... 3 good days I get at least 1 of my knifes back." Izaya leaned in so that his and the fake blondes were closer.
            "Fine, the day only counts if you eat one meal that I deam a meal, you don't harm yourself or anyone else unless needed to do so, and no running back to Shiki." Shizuo tried to move his face back his ears reddening and cheeks turning a tint of pink.
           "Hey I am starting to think you're jealous of Shiki, as much as you talk about him.~" Izaya smirked grew as the blonde scoffed.

~Shizuo pov~

        "As if, that dude is just disgusting. Always being so touchy with you and letting his gang do that. Not listening and just ignorant. Like he doesn't see how valueable his group could be. But instead they kick people down and do shit to them." I huffed moving the raven off of me, why is he all in my face now. Jealous me, I'm not jelous of Shiki g-god no.
          "You do know part of what you just said proved my point Shizuo-chan?~ Heh, you don't have to worry, happens to a lot of people silly. Jealous is normal my monster." Izaya said leaning back since the other kept pushing him away.
            "Oh, so you've felt it then too Izaya? You can accuse me of being jealous but I want to know when you were jealous and why?"
            "I've been jealous, use to get that way about a lot of things. How normal people got by, I use to be jealous of people who hung out with certain people. Guess I use to be the same way with thier potential. That doesn't matter really because I don't get that way any more."
           "Not at all? Why is that?" My eyes watching the other as he streched out on the bed still in my lap partially.
           "Cause that cause anger, and that's no good. You don't think straight when you're jealous. You do things you wouldn't normally do. Like you Shizu-chan. All I want is info, but I care about you now so I'm doing this for you. Back then you would even hesitate to kill me and now here you are." The smaller boy began to laugh looking to me.
          "You know jealous isn't the only emotion that coulds people? There o-other feelings that do that like uh.. Loyalty, or um... I don't know things okay. I had plenty of opportunities to kill you yes, but I never did. So what theres a big change its not like people don't change."
             "There are other emotions true but they don't fit. Loyalty who you being loyal to? Anger, why would you do this out of anger? Guilt, for what our fights. Love, as if my monster loved me. Just being an idiot, that could be and opption too. So idiot, why didn't you kill me when you had the chances to do so?" Izaya smirked as I glared down at him.
          "I'm not an idiot, and I just couldn't do it. Sure I'm good at throwing people around when they piss me off but with you, I'm not even sure. But I'm here now, not being an idiot and I'm here for you."
            "Maybe the monster does love someone?~ hahaha as if?~" The raven sat up laughing at me, I never thought about it that way. I chuckled it off watching him lay back down. He crossed his hands behing his head, I wondered if that hurt his arm. It was so easy to see his slim figure the way he laid.
        "Hello, earth to Shizu-chan? I was only joking about you being stupid."
         "What if it was one of those other reasons or a factor of more then one? Would it bother you?" I could see his expression change.
            "What do you mean? Like I guess really depends on which? Why do you ask?"
             "N-no reason. How's your arm does Shinra need to stitch it or like do we need to clean it. I uhhh... Don't know how this whole thing works."
            "Rule number 1 we never tell Shinra unless I'm clearly dying hes last option, I hate lectures. 2 I do my cleaning plus I take care of my belongings so it getting infected won't happen. And 3 its not deep enough to make and big problem." Izaya scoffed mumbling another thing under his breath but I couldn't hear him. "Anyways... I'm glad you 'care' weather its to your benifit or not I'm glad somebody does...."
             I nodded, not really knowing how to respond to the other. I felt a warming burn in my chest feeling the important feeling in someone else life kinda nice, scart but nice. "Need anything?"
              Izaya shook his head rolling out of bed. "I'm gonna go do some work so they don't think I'm dead. And don't worry mr.body gaurd its just office work today. House is yours too I guess so do whatever." He shrugged leaving me in the room kinda was all over the pace not knowing what to really think anymore.

A/n
Hellos, currently I'm working on 3 differant stories at once (dis one my favorite though but, if you're looking for a certain kinda ship or fandom fanfic don't hesitate on asking for them through comments here, on my profile or just messaging me.
Hope you all have a swell day and I hope you're all doing good. Bye bye;) )