Carmen

Toned Down

Pick a personality for free. 

When you feel like nobody, body. 

Born with a void, hard to destroy with love, or hope. 

Built with a heart broken from the start, and now I die slow. 

In the Valley of the Dolls we sleep. 

Got a hole inside of me. 

Living with identities, that do not belong to me. 

In my life I got this far, now I'm ready for the last hoorah. 

Dying like a shooting star. 

In the Valley......

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Carmen

       After a long school day of being ignored by the love of my life....... a normal day for me, I was finally home in my bed. I was so relaxed until my idiot brother walked in. 

"What do you want" I said, covering my head with my pillow.

"Whats the matter, sis?" He asked.

"Nothing. None of your business. Good bye" I mumbled.

"Look you ungrateful little......"

"Look are you gonna leave or just it there talking, because believe me, Im not listening" I said.

"Why are you acting so bitchy? Im just trying to be a big brother!" He yelled, as he got up to leave.

"Wait Caleb! Im sorry.... I just had a long day..." I said, feeling sorry for his attempt to care. 

"Care to tell me about it?" He sat back next to me on the bed, as I spilled my guts about how Jacob ignores me and how I LOVE him.

"Kid with the afro?"  He asked.

"Yes..." I bit my lip. "Kid with the afro"  I told him how I didn't understand why Jacob doesn't like me..... Im perfect. More than perfect. Flawless. Yet still he ignores my presence.

"Well maybe he doesn't like conceited girls. Maybe you should tone it down..." 

"Are you serious.... how can I tone This down" I said, pointing to every inch of my perfect self. 

"Like I said, make he doesn't like all that extra" 

"I've never heard of toning myself down to get someone's attention."  thought about it.

"Try it out." and with that my brother left me in my room thinking. Maybe toning it down just for a day would work.... But what about my rep? Having the flyest clothes? The prettiest make up? The bombest hair? I'm only doing this for Jacob.... Its worth a try....

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I was up at 4 in the morning trying to figure out how to "tone it down". Those words of my brother traveled through my mind. My brother passed my room, and then walked back.

"The hell are you doing up this early" He said, staring at my clothes scattered everywhere.

"I don't know what to do, Caleb... I have nothing to tone down my look" I cried.

"Don't worry I got you."  He went to my mom's room. No he is not about to......

"Here, put this on" 

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?" I said, staring at the T shirt and the ripped jeans.

"Just put it on." He said. 

After I did my morning routine, it was 5 am, the time I usually wake up. I put on those ..... rags.... my brother gave me. I looked a hot ass mess. I tied the shirt in the back, because it was too big. and I put on the ripped jeans, and a pair of converse. I put my hair up, trying to look as normal as possible.

"You don't look so bad, dude" My brother said. 

"Whatever lets go for breakfast, since mom is still asleep" I said. We both got in the car, and he took me to iHop. I got a short stack of pancakes, eggs, and bacon, and so did he. We finished eating and  it was about 6 am.

"Ok, time to take you to school." He said.

"Oh my God....." 

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Once I arrived at school, everyone's eyes were on me......

"Um.... new look?" Jessica said, giving me an uneasy look.

"Just for today, Jes..... I promise just for today"  She just looked at me like something was wrong.

"Are you ok?" She asked. 

"I'm fine Taylor"  We walked in the school, and I hear people whispering about me. 

"What is she wearing?"

"Is she ok?"

"Whats up with the outfit?"

"I kind of like it. I might try that.."

I smiled at the last comment I heard. Then I spotted him at his locker, looking at me..... HE IS FUCKING LOOKING AT ME. CARMEN BRADLY.  He pulled off his shades and placed them in his locker. I took a deep breath, and walked over to him. 

"Hi....." I said. 

"Hello there" He said.... he stopped looking at me. Soon the hall cleared and it was just me and Jacob in the hallway late for class.

"Jacob, listen. I don't know why you don't like me. But I'm freaking in LOVE with you. Why don't you ever look at me? Everyone else does!" I said. He stared down at me.

"Im not everyone else" He said, then he walked away......... Just leaving me there. I couldn't have been more shamed, even though we were the only ones there.... I was still shamed. My cheeks turned bright red, as tears threatened to leave my eyes. I slid down the lockers, putting my head to my knees. Why doesn't he like me.... I just don't get it. 

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*Twerks* HI EVERYONE!!!!! Here's chapter two!!!! 

I'm loving writing this story so far..... Why do YOU guys think Jacob doesn't like Carmen? 

LEAVE COMMENTS! 

FOLLOW MEEEEEEEEEEEEE *spongebob voice* @_ThaDiamondz

BT duuuuuuuuubs: the song at the beginning is "VALLEY OF THE DOLLS" by Marina and The Diamonds!! LOVE THAT SONG!!! 

PICTURE OF Jessica ON THE SIDE --------------------->