physical therapy// discontinued

0.5

"when i catch fire, and wash over you like the sun." -5 seconds of summer, catch fire

***

"i brought music for you to play. is that ok?"

it was thursday and the drum of the pouring rain outside barely drowned out the excited chatter of the collective group of kids seated criss-cross on the carpet. the tiny red-head from the week before shyly ambled up to where i was tuning my cello at the front of the room and handed me a crumpled score of sheet music.

"it's my favorite song," he said quietly, "my daddy plays it on the guitar, but i like the cello better."

i smiled at him softly and took the music from his marker stained fingertips, "of course i'll play it."

a hasty glance at the notes told me that the piece was a revised version of starlight by muse. as i skimmed over the accidentals and various key changes, i felt the pressure of an arm sling around my shoulder.

"the kid has good music taste," luke said, peering over my shoulder, "when i was five i listened to the wiggles."

"i'm six!" an indignant voice shouted across the room, making luke shake with quiet laughter.

in the past two weeks, luke and i had settled into a standard routine. he would finish his physical therapy session, then walk downstairs, grab two coffees on the way; one black, one with two sugars, and meet me in the recreation room, where i played for varied amounts of time, depending on the audience's patience that day. after i finished we would walk to different locations scattered throughout the hospital, dipping into old patients room to say hello and helping the nurses decorate the pediatric center with finger paintings and brightly colored stickers.

after flying through starlight, and various pop songs, luke pushed past the kids scrambling out of the rec room and rested a heavy elbow on my head, whining softly, "i think i might die from mal nutrition. i'm starving."

i wrinkled my nose at his lanky figure, hovered over my crouched position next to my cello case, "it's 5 pm, i think you'll be ok."

"wow thanks for informing me on the time, bea," luke scoffed sarcastically, "but i doubt that that highly valuable information is pertinent to my starvation."

"look at you, using big words and being educated."

"shut up and come to the food court with me."

"do i have a choice?"

***********************

the food court smelled like a mix of grease and water logged vegetables, and was crowded with patients decked in hospital gowns and visiting families. it was obvious that the hospital was trying hard to boast health foods and organic goods, but most of the fruits lay soggy and rotten with condensation and the vegetables were tangled in a burnt mess of boiled water and uneaten bits. luke automatically made a beeline for the crowded kfc in the corner, his blue eyes set on the red and white awning.

"you are a disgusting person," i wrinkled my nose at the basket of fried chicken luke carried to a small booth in the corner. the pieces of chicken pressed against the sides of the container, staining the paper lining with grease and fat. luke shrugged and dug heartedly into the chicken.

"better than all that 'healthy' shit they put out there."

"i'm not so sure. i mean just look-"

"bea? what are you doing here?"

a starch, articulated voice interrupted me, as a cold hand was placed on my shoulder. i turned around to face a pale figure, with matte red lips, and blond hair pulled into a tight, glossy bun. the tall woman, clad in a doctors coat, knit her eyebrows at me in confusion. "you're not sick are you?"

i smiled politely, "hi dr. miranda. no i'm not sick i'm just volunteering in the pediatric ward."

she nodded and flashed a curious smile at luke, "is this your boyfriend?"

luke nearly choked on the chicken breast he was gnawing and flushed crimson, "no ma'am, just friends."

dr. miranda looked slightly disappointed, "oh. well bea, i do hope that you will find some sort of romantic solace soon. it would be a relief for you after these past two months."

i coughed awkwardly, "yeah i guess...." i could feel luke's confused gaze burning a hole through my sweater.

"and your mother too. how's she doing? i can't imagine losing someone like she did, especially a girl like-"

"my mom's fine," i interuppted, a trace of frustration laced in my voice. i stood up suddenly and flashed dr. miranda a hasty smile, "anyway, luke and i should really get going. it was great seeing you." i grabbed luke's hand and did my best in dragging his lanky body away from the food court.

"tell your mom to give me a call if she needs anything," she called after us as we rushed away.

i pulled luke into an empty elevator and pushed a random button, before slumping against the glass walls. a delicate silence ensued and i raised an eyebrow at luke, who was rubbing the side of his face awkwardly.

"you aren't going to ask me what happened back there?"

"not unless you want to tell me."

there was another minute of heavy silence before i hesitated and sighed reluctantly, "that was my sister's pediatrician."

"you never told me that you have a sister."

"had." i whispered quietly, "i had a sister. she died two months ago in a car crash."

there it was, the bomb had dropped.

i wasn't sure if i was ready for the mass casualties.

i turned away from luke's shocked expression and faced my own reflection in the mirrored walls, bracing myself for the barrage of sorry's and she's in a better place.

but they never came.

i turned quietly and met luke's gaze, which burned with quiet blue intensity. "how old was she?"

a familiar choking feeling rose in my throat and i struggled to oppress the urge to cry, "eleven."

"you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

god dammit luke. you can't just do that. you can't just be an understanding person and stand there with your stubbled chin and blue eyes and empathy carving out your features. fuck you.

i studied luke. a glance at his tense muscles revealed held back curiosity and questions. a glance at his fumbling fingers revealed nervousness and anticipation. and a glance at his electric eyes revealed trust and hope.

(i hadn't seen trust and hope in so long, i had almost forgotten what they felt like.)

i felt my rigid facade slowly crumbling and i exhaled quietly, "you're right luke, i don't have to talk about it."

a slump of his features and the flicker of trust slowly disappearing.

"but i want to."

the flicker was back and i could see it slowly catching fire.

a/n:

i'm back !!

this update is kind of a filler, but more stuff will be revealed in the next chapter i sweaR

i've been swamped with school and orchestra rehearsals and extracurriculars and i'm really really sorry bc i hate that i don't update enough and i don't want you guys to get tired of this book. but i'm on thanksgiving break now and i hope i can squeeze in some more updates this week.

THIS NEXT PART IS REALLY IMPORTANT OK. OK.

i probably won't update, or work on anything for the next month until the holiday break bc i'll be stressing about midterm exams and final projects. i hope you guys understand.

love you guys lots. :)) pls vote and comment and follow my twitter !! ; excitedirwinx

peace and cheer,

eve