Short Monologues for Teen Girls/Young Women

Useful

Useful

By M. E. Hammer

(Approximately 2 min. 5 seconds)

Setting: [Violetta is in a private room at the station downtown with Officer Beare, a gentle policeman who's interviewing her upon the arrest of her mysterious husband, with which she had eloped eleven months ago]

Violetta:

(Drunk, but speaks peacefully and warmly)

I do a lot of things, Officer, I'm very useful. I'm always there to help, 'cause that's what you need to do, help people. I can get things done very well and fast; I won't make you wait too long. It's not good to make you wait too long. Irresponsible.

(Firmly crosses arms. Contorts in pain, and rubs her wrist. Speaks reassuringly)

I have weak wrists. I get hurt a lot, but that's all right. I'm very tough and I can handle pain very well. Some people can't, but I know that some people just can't handle pain the way I do. And that's all right; not everyone's the same. I'm always there to help.

(Coughs and stumbles. Smiles reassuringly)

I'm very clumsy, even when I'm not drinking a little bit. I just need to sometimes; it helps me. And then I can keep going all right, it helps me be more useful. I really am very useful; he says I'm very useful. I like when he says that.

You can always depend on me, and I'm not afraid . . . not afraid of . . .

(Smile becomes fake as she looks away. Coughs).

I'm thirsty now.

(Grabs cup and takes a drink, but coughs, spilling drink on Officer Beare. Becomes instantly terrified and frantic)

I'm so sorry, so sorry, I'm so sorry! Don't do anything, I will clean it. I'm so clumsy, I'm sorry. Just stay right there.

(Takes off scarf and tries to clean up)

I'm sorry! I am useful, I can be— I am. Please, stay sitting; please, stay there.

(Officer Beare tries to get up)

No, please stay there. I can clean it. I'm cleaning it, see? No, please don't get up!

(Throws hands up before her)

Please don't hit me!