Hidden Scars (Ashton Irwin fanfic)

Chapther 9

Ashton released me from his embrace and made a gesture towards the bathroom. "Go take a nice long warm shower and get cleaned up. I'll grab you some clothes to wear," he said as he began to walk towards my new room.

I went straight to the bathroom and turned on the shower. I stripped down and looked at my reflection in the mirror. So many cuts and bruises littered my body. My face was swollen, my nose must've been bleeding and the cuts on my stomach had left crusted blood everywhere. I sighed and shook my head as I turned around, climbing under the steamy water. When the water ran over my cuts I winced at the pain. I tried my best to wash myself with out causing anymore pain but gave up after a good 10 minutes.

I heard the door crack open and Ash say, "Hey babe. It's just me. I'm gonna leave your clothes on the counter."

"Ok, thank you," I replied as I rinsed the shampoo out of my long dark brown hair. After a few short seconds I heard the door close again. I finished washing my hair and stepped out of the shower, drying off with a towel. I glanced in the mirror at the reflection of a foreign girl. When did I get this bad? It seems that only moments ago I was a healthy little girl hugging her daddy's neck while he brought her up to bed. I wiped away the tears that threatened to fall and scanned the counter for the clothes Ashton left for me. I grabbed the grey joggers and one direction t-shirt, quickly slipping them on. Taking a deep breath in, I stepped out of the bathroom, looking around the dark hallway. From the living room I could hear voices. I walked closer to them but stopped right before I came into view.

"I'm sorry, mom," I heard Ashton say. "I should've been there to help her."

"Ash, honey, it's not your fault. I'm just glad she's okay now. Where is she?" Jo's voice asked.

"She should be getting out of the shower any moment now. I just want to warn you that she's pretty beat up."

"I know." The only thing I wanted to do was run back in the bathroom and lock the door so I wouldn't have to face Jo. I really loved her but I didn't want to tell her my secret and I knew Ashton was going to make me. I took in a deep breath and stepped round the corner to see Ashton sitting quietly on the love seat, Jo right next to him as she rubbed his back.

"Hi," I said quietly, almost not audible. Jo's head turned towards me and she immediately covered her mouth.

"Oh honey. What happened?" She stood up and ran over to me, wrapping me in her embrace. That's when I lost it. I cried into her shirt and told her that the boys beat me up and left me bloody in the parking lot and how Ashton found me in the parking lot. We eventually made it to the couch where I sat, leaning against Jo, as I tried to calm down. When I could finally breathe normally I looked up at Ashton. He smiled at me and nodded at his mom, signaling for me to tell her my big secret.

"Jo?" I said quietly as I wiped my face dry and looked up at her.

"Yes, Tor?"

"I-I need to tell y-you something. It's not a good thing and I just...I just don't want you to hate me when I tell you."

"Oh my god are you pregnant!" She exclaimed making me let out a nervous chuckle.

"No I'm not pregnant. It's...it's not quite that bad but um Ashton thought you deserved to know..."

"Go on, sweetie."

"Well," I began, stopping briefly to figure out where to start. "Three years ago, my dad was shot and killed in front of my mother and I." A gasp escaped her lips and I stared at the ground, not able to make eye contact. "A guy came to our house and forced us all into the living room, holding us hostage with a gun. He told my dad if he didn't get what he wanted he would take me away and swore that I'd never be seen again. My dad and I had always had a close bond so his immediate response was to take his life instead of taking me away from him." I felt the hot tears stream down my face and didn't even bother to wipe them away. "The guy said he would never kill my father until he told him where the money was. My dad told him where it was and the man grabbed my arm and tried to drag me away. My dad ran after him and managed to get me out of his hole but was shot twice in the process. The mystery man ran out the door, cursing and left my dad bleeding on the floor. My mom called 911 but by the time they got there, it was too late. My mom was never the same again. The first night, she held me to her as she cried with me, repeatedly saying it would be okay. After that I never really sorry her." My voice began cracking as my body shook with sobs. "She would lock herself in her room for days at a time. Never leaving except for maybe once to use the bathroom. After a month I gave up trying to get through to her. That's when she turned to drugs and since she needed drugs, she needed money. She would always bring home random men and have sex with them, soon becoming a well known prositute. Then whenever she saw me she'd make sure to tell me how much of a disappointment I am and how it was my fault my dad died. That's when it all started." I took in a shaky breath before continuing. "I began to get depressed and I began to self harm."

"Oh honey. I'm so sorry." Jo's hand gently stroked my cheek as she wiped away the tears, only making me cry harder.

"Ash says I need help. I haven't stopped. I've self harmed for three years and attempted suicide 2 times." I turned to her and looked into her eyes with the most pleading look. "Please help me," I cried out before she pulled me to her chest again, rubbing small circles in my back.

"Shh baby it's okay. I'll get you all the help you need."

Omg hi guys!
It's been sooooooooo long and I feel like such a bad person. You can hate me it's okay. Here's a bit of an emotional chapter for you. I'll try to update more often but no promises. Ugh I feel so horrible. Anyway, I love you all and hope you are loving my story!

Xoxoxoxoxox