Kili was walking in the woods late at night. He was suppose to meet Tauriel there for a secret rendezvous and something else if ya know what I mean ;)))) I meant they're gonna break dance together!! Kili is a terrible dancer and Tauriel figured she could show him a thing or two. But it's been 3 hours and she hasn't showed up. Kili had enough! He turned around and headed back home.
But all of a sudden, he heard a rustling noise. Kili stopped in his tracks. The bushes began to move and he could tell there was someone, or something, here with him. And something tells Kili it's been watching him the whole time. In one swift move, Kili grabs his bow and aims it at the dark figure. "WHO GOES THERE???" Kili yelled. All of a sudden the figure appeared from the bushes. It had shorts, no shirt on and had only one nipple. In the middle. The creature looked at him dead in the eyes.
"Tauriel, is that you????" Kili asked. "what teh fak do I luk lyke a gurl t u, I outta pee on u rite now" the creature snarled. "Well then who are you???" Kili asked once again.
"HIS NAME IS JOHN CENA." an unknown voice screamed at the top of their lungs. Loud music that almost made Kili's ears bleed began to play. Kili was no longer in the woods but at a wrestling arena. John Cena was jumping around the arena, trying to excite the crowd even more. He started to whip and nae nae but he hit that whip too hard and died the next day due to internal bleeding.
