Bloody November

Silence

I FINALLY have a chapter for you guys! I know it's been a few weeks and I'm sorry. I didn't expect college to be so crazy. I really appreciate you guys for sticking with me (: I hope you like the chapter! Please comment and VOTE! Oh, and please check out my new posts. I'm looking for my next story and need your help.

Now without further ado...enjoy!

November 3, 2011

6:30 am

My eyelids flutter open to an early morning. I can see the sunset through my bleach white curtains and struggle to swallow the lump in my throat; the lump that's been permanently jammed down my throat since last night. I wriggle my fingers as I begin to sit up and frown when I see a pencil laying across my palm. My mother's sketchbook is tucked into my side. It's open, revealing a drawing that wasn't there before.

For a moment, I just stare at it as if it was some kind of jigsaw puzzle. The scene etched in lead seems so familiar . . . so -

Before I can process what's happening, my hands are ripping the drawing to shreds. I don't know what possessed them to act on their own but I can't get the picture out of my head now.

Why did I draw that?

Footsteps on the stairs cause me to panic. The dead silence causes them to almost echo against the walls. I begin to shove the confetti under my sheets and stretch the comforter over me as far as it will go. My heart is racing in my chest and I fear he'll be able to count the heartbeats because it's so quiet.

Why is it so quiet?

I yelp when my phone goes off and 'New Message!' flashes across the screen.

"Honey! Are you alright?"

Seeing such alarm on my father's face made me feel silly and stupid and that much more protective. My little yelp did more than give me a good scare, it gave my father a heart attack.

He can't know. He isn't ready.

"I . . . I'm fine."

He's already pulling me into him and my voice is muffled against his shirt. He coincidentally presses my head against his chest and I can hear how fast his heart is racing. I gulp.

"Thank God. Don't scare me like that again, okay? With the killer still out there..." He trails off, leaving my imagination to fill in the blanks. Finally he swallows and loosens his grip just a tiny bit before whispering, "I don't know what I'd do if I lost you."

A lump of tears begins to form in the base of my throat, the salt making my eyes sting. I squeeze my eyes shut and nod my head into his shoulder.

I don't know how long we sit here like this. But when he finally returns to his room to finish getting ready, my shoulder is damp. I watch his back shrink into the distance with that feeling of invisibility I know all too well. Swallowing hard, I slowly get out of bed and walk into the bathroom to stare at myself in the mirror.

The girl in my reflection smiles at me but it isn't the happy kind of smile; there is no cheer or joy or happiness. Just satisfaction and malevolence. I blink and she's still smiling.

"I didn't kill her," I whisper to the mirror, hoping she would hear me. "I'm innocent . . . I . . . I didn't kill her."

The girl in the mirror is whispering too. But her lips aren't moving in sync with mine, their movement doesn't match the words coming out my mouth. I squint my eyes, trying to decipher what she's saying.

It's just a word. One word.

Guilty.

A bird from outside causes me to jump. The girl and the smile is gone when I catch my breath. My reflection is looking back at me, mimicking my every move. I turn away to pull back the shower curtains and turn on the water, twisting the knob as cold as it would go. I don't want to feel right now.