You put the music in my heart. -Sequel-

Chapter 6.

"I'm still uncomfortable," I complained.

Ben huffed out, "Alex, I don't know how to help you anymore."

I was sitting on the floor at the coffee table on a couch cushion, trying to eat the four things I ordered from Taco Bell and watch Ridiculousness. "I don't know either."

I got up on the couch and pulled my nachos into my lap. Ben got up and sat next to me, digging into his steak burrito. I was still uncomfortable. After squirming around far another few minutes, Ben rolled his eyes and muttered, "Adelaide, you better be worth it."

I rolled my eyes, "You know she will be."

He put his hand on my stomach and smiled, "I know."

That night, Ben took a shower after I had already crawled into bed. When he came back to go to sleep, I was spread out all over bed. "Babe," Ben said, "Babe, I seriously can't  get into bed. Alex, fucking move. Alexandria? Okay, fine. I'll sleep on the couch. I love you." He kissed my cheek and walked out of the room with a yawn.

I thought that was cute. He didn't even know I was awake, and he still said I love you.

I woke up in the middle of the night, and I really wanted peanut butter. I went back downstairs and grabbed a jar of extra crunchy and a spoon. Forgetting that Ben had slept on the couch, I waled into the living room to watch TV. What I found was the most adorable thing ever.

Ben was laying on the couch, cuddling a little wolf plushie from Adelaide's room. I actually broke out into tears and sat down at Ben's feet. He woke up to find me crying and eating peanut butter from a jar. He started laughing sleepily and wrapped his arms around me, "What's wrong honey?"

"This is just so cute," I sobbed, my voice muffed by peanut butter.

 He wrapped his arms around me and chuckled slightly. There is was again, one big happy family.

The next few days wasn't very fun. I was used to crawling in bed with Ben every night, and I was really dreading having him spend the night somewhere else. When the day came, I was crying, giving Ben the biggest, longest hug I ever had. He whispered, "I really don't have to go."

"Yes you do," I cried onto his shoulder. "This is your clothing line. You have to go."

"Do you want to come with me?"

I shook my head, "I have to go to this appointment."

Ben took the car and I cried some more until I had to get ready for my appointment. I had gotten bigger again. Ben said he hadn't noticed, but I sure had. I slipped into a pair of new jeans that I had gotten from a pregnancy store and put on a hoodie. Just as I decided to put on a small amount of makeup, I heard a knock at the door.

I answered it to find Sam smiling at me, "Hello, darling."

"Hi, Sam!" I smiled, giving him a hug. "How are you?"

"I'm alright," He said, stepping inside. "Can I use your washroom before we head off?"

"Of course, you know where it is." I said, grabbing my bag.

It was really cold and snowy outside. I got in the car and rubbed my hands together. "It's really cold out today, huh?"

"Yeah, Cam has been complaining about it all morning. He has the heat so high I was happy to leave," Sam turned on the car and pulled out of the driveway.

I grinned, "So how is it going, living with Cameron?"

"Oh, you know, it's pretty good," He said, but he looked over come with joy. "How about you and Ben?"

"It's going really well," I smiled at him, putting my hand on my stomach. "He's handling this way better than I thought. The other night I found him cuddling with a stuffed wolf that we bought for Adelaide."

I looked back to the road and that's when it happened. "Sam, look out! There's a deer in the road!"

A swerve, a jark, an airbag, Sam passed out at the wheel, and I doctor saying I'm sorry.

And they said that was it.

I was sitting at home later that night, thinking about the trip to the hospital. They said they couldn't find a heartbeat, but they weren't sure. They wanted to take her out, but I wouldn't let them until they were sure. They said they would take another test in the morning, but they said that there was almost no hope. But I could feel it. There was hope. She was still there. I could tell.

In the middle of my thinking, I felt it. A kick. A sign of hope. Adelaide was still there, I just knew it.

Or was I in denial?

Ben busted through the door, "Alexandria, I came as soon as I could! What happened? Is everything okay? What.. what?" He was out of breath as he approached me.

I shook my head and with silent tears said, "They can't find a heartbeat. They want to run a test in the morning, but they think she's gone."

"No" Ben whispered. "No!"

"We swerved, they road was icy and there was a deer," I cried out. "The airbag.. Ben, Ben? Look at me, please."

He stood with his head down. "No, I can't. I can't fucking do this!"

He run upstairs without another look in my direction. Moments later, I heard crashing and banging and Ben yelling in anger. I ran upstairs as fast as I could. Adelaide's room was destroyed. The dollhouse we had bought was shattered on the ground. The wolves were all ripped. The crib was knocked over. He was standing in the middle of the room with his head down, holding a leg to the smashed rocking chair.

"Everything is gonna be okay," I cried quietly.

"No, it isn't Alexandria!" He said, throwing the leg across the room and hitting the wall. "I'm never gonna hold her. I'm never going to see her take her first steps, or teach her how to ride a bike. I'm not gonna send her off on her first day of school, or see her smile when she looses her first tooth. I'm not gonna take pictures of her before prom, I'm not gonna walk her down the isle. She's gone! And I'm not getting her back! My Adelaide is gone.."

He dropped to his knees and buried his face in his hands. "She's gone.."

I wrapped my arms around him. I wanted to tell him that she wasn't gone. I wanted to tell her that I knew she was still there. But if I was wrong, I'd break his heart even more, and I just couldn't d that to him. "Im so sorry, Ben."