Lovesick

Way to start off Summer

So I know I finished the book hastily and stupidly, but that's how things ended and these past few weeks alots changed so here's some of what happened. I really don't wanna finish the book. This book has been like a diary. I can say and do things I never could in person, and that's the greatest feeling ever so thank you for reading my horrible crappy story.

                                                ~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'

Hell.

That's the only thing I can think of to describe these past few weeks. After Aiden dumped me like a hot potato I lost some friends which I was expected, but it doesn't hurt any less. I don't live in the same town as everyone so I just sit at home work out because I just can't force myself to go to summer work outs and see him and certain other people and drive all that way. It was bad enough I had to see him the last week of school.

So I work out on my own run to the lake and just think alot.

I haven't talked to Lily since school got out. I seriously don't know what happened we just drifted apart and don't talk. I wish we were best friends again. I miss her alot.

Kristen, Tiffiany, and Malorie seem to be having a good summer. I'm happy for them. I've talked to them a little. I wish I could be as happy as them, but I'm not.

Taylor and I have spend some time together going to volleyball stuff. She's been there for me and I'm very grateful that she listens to me and my stupid problems.

Derek and Riley seem to be having a good summer they're still together and sometimes when I see pictures of them and cry thinking that should be Aiden and I too.

I guess Aiden thinks he's a player or something I don't know. He just wants to be friends and I tried and I just can't it hurts too much. Maybe someday but not now.

I'm sorry I can't automatically turn my feelings off and not love you anymore. Believe me I would if I could. But apparently you can.

I think that's everything. I made all A's on my finals and made straight A's for the year and got commended on two STAARS( A really freaking hard test)

So I was happy about that.

The day after fourth of July I'm leaving this stupid town and getting away for a week. I'm very excited about that. I just need time away and maybe when I come back I'll patch things up and figure out what I did wrong and what I want to do about things.

                                       ~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'~~'

Very exciting I know. It sucks but that's pretty much the highlights of these past weeks have been. I have no clue when I'll update or if I even will but I really love writing this book and I think I'll miss it too much. And hey things have to get better at some point Right? Hopefully.

                                                                                                                          -Caitlyn