Not Just Acting (Negovanman)

Chapter 1

I frown as I hear the final words from the director.

"That's a wrap!" Spencer yells out to the hard-working cast and crew I had grown to love in the span of a short time.

Everyone cheers but I can't help but feel a little sad about it all. This show created my career, made me smile, made me cry, made me feel everything. It's hard to be done with yet another season. We don't even know if it's going to continue. Budgets are tight. Each season feels like an end to me, so I get so emotional.

I finished filming the most entertaining and hilarious show ever called Carmilla as Laura Hollis, a perky young lady with major feeling for a vampire, but that means I'll be seeing less of the cast. Of course, by cast I mean Natasha. I love the whole cast and am good friends with all of them, but my attachment to Natasha seems unbreakable, especially with the large crush I've developed for her over the past three seasons. I won't see her every day, bright and early. I won't get to complain to her about the unfair working hours or the lack of sweets on set, mainly because I've probably eaten them all. All I'll have left is my boring, lonely apartment and my social awkwardness.

I look for Natasha in the crowd and find that she's already staring at me, from what I can see through my tearful eyes at least. Wow, the final wrap really gets to me every time.

I am quick to wipe my eyes to get a clear vision of the beautiful, Natasha Negovanlis across the room. We lock eyes and I feel my heart pounding already. Her "seduction eyes" as we call them on the show are even more intense in person rather than on a screen. I am sure she's well aware of her effect on others when she looks at them too. No one can resist a stare like that. That dark gaze doesn't just go away behind a camera.

A smirk forms on her red lips as she makes her way towards me. I'm too frozen to move or to push my way through the crowd to meet her in the middle. I can only stand like an idiot, staring at the woman I have an unshakable crush on.

"Elise," Natasha says once she's close enough to me. Just the way she says my name takes my breath away. She places both hands on the sides of my cheeks and uses her thumbs to wipe away the tears falling from my eyes. I have to appreciate her kindness towards me and others; she's the sweetest. After her cute smiles grows, her arms wrap around my neck and she pulls me in closer for a hug. I completely melt into her warm embrace that feels a lot like home and place my arms tightly around her waist, not wanting to let go. "Please don't cry." Her voice is gentle and soothing, making my heart pound even harder against my chest. I hope she doesn't feel it.

"I can't help it," I mumble into her neck.

Natasha leans back far enough to look into my eyes. I know she's tough, but how could she not be crying right now? This is an emotional time in life.

"Can I try to make you feel better?" she asks softly.

She's already doing one hell of a job making me feel better. She has no idea.

"Go ahead," I say with a shaky voice.

If this were my dreams, she would be kissing me right now. Not a lame, PG-13 kiss like in Carmilla either; I mean a long, passionate kiss that would completely block out all the surroundings around us. A kiss that would never be forgotten. A kiss that could never be faked and recreated for a film.

"Would you like to come to a little Carmilla celebration tonight at a club nearby here with me and some of the cast? Of course, when the night is over and everyone starts to leave, you aren't allowed to cry." The teasing tone in her voice in literally killing me.

"I'd love to," I say a little too quickly. I regain myself, taking a silent deep breath. "It sounds like it could be fun." Fun to get out of my room and stop watching fan-made YouTube videos of me and Natasha apparently having secret feeling for each other.

"Great." Natasha leans down closer to me, glancing around as she does. "Shall we do a little shopping in the wardrobe and prop room?" The smirk on her face as she says that is enough to get me to do anything she wants.

I nod vigorously, unable to form actual words.

She grabs my hand gently, causing butterflies to erupt in my stomach, and pulls me away from everyone. We go up the stairs and to the first room on the left.

We do this every year, sometimes getting caught and yelled at but sometimes not. The clothes that my character in the show wears are actually pretty cool and fitting with my style. Natasha, on the other hand, prefers the darker clothes that Carmilla wears. She's one of those dark, mysterious, and sexy women when it comes to her wardrobe, and I absolutely love it.

"Hey, Elise." Natasha smiles at me as she holds up a top over her body. It's one of the shirts that I wore, as Laura, during season two. "What do you think?"

"I think you'll look great in anything," I mumble so quietly that I'm sure she's unable to hear it.

"Sorry, what was that?" She takes a step closer to me, expecting me to be quiet again.

"I said that you'd look good in it." I hide the blush in my cheeks from complimenting her by turning around. I stare at my feet as I inhale and exhale, controlling my heart beat and putting it back to a normal beating pattern. I look up to see a mirror and Natasha is staring at me through it. My intense blush comes back.

"Hey, are you okay?" Her hand lands on my back and moves in soothing circles. I almost shiver at her touch, but I control myself.

"Yeah, I'm just a little sad about ending the show," I say in a believable tone, which is partly true. It's just not the whole truth to what I'm feeling right now. Thank god for my acting experience and skills.

"A little?" Natasha smiles and then wraps her arm around my shoulder, tossing the shirt on the nearest thing, which is a chair. "Elise, I know it has had a big impact on both of us but I guarantee a third season. The popularity of it is growing with our beautiful fans, and there's no way there are not going to be enough people asking for that third season and contributing to the fund." She presses her forehead into the side of my head so her lips hover right in front of my ear. My heart is about to explode out of my chest. "Okay?" Her smooth voice drips to every bone in my body that makes me unable to move and barely respond.

"Okay." I bite my lip to hide my huge grin.

When I look at her through the mirror, I see her staring down at me with her dark eyes. I swear that I see her eyes flicker to my lips before she turns away and goes back to looking through the wardrobe. I miss her warm touch already. Even if it is just acting in Carmilla, I miss the looks she gives me and the way she holds me and needs to constantly be the physically closest to me out of the others.

Natasha ends up taking that shirt and I take nothing. Usually, I take a small prop that they wouldn't miss, but I was too invested in hearing Natasha talk that I couldn't concentrate at looking through the collection. Now it's time to leave the set for who knows how long. With the help of what Natasha said, I do know that there's going to be another chance at a different set next year. I just have to be patient and hopeful.

I get another long hug from Natasha. It's warm and more comfortable than anything else in the world. I want it to be longer but she pulls back, due to her mumbling about having an appointment to get to. She pauses, arm's length away from me, and just stares at me.

"I'll see you later, creampuff," she says with a wink. I can't hold back my grin from there as she mocks her confident character.

Then, she turns away and leaves the room.

I'm left standing there, staring at the door where I saw her last. People move around me, congratulating me and patting my back but I barely pay attention. I'd rather have it be Natasha. No matter how much time I spend with her from filming, I always wish for it to be longer. There's no getting bored of her. Us talking between scenes and during our breaks are the best part of it all. I usually only get to talk to her character, aside from interviews and the little time we spend together hanging out. You'd think talking to a super old vampire who loves you would be entertaining if it weren't for following a script. No. It's Natasha that's more entertaining. She's funny, smart, and comes up with the most entertaining things to talk about that no one else in the world could top. She is everything I could want in someone.