Inferno

Chapter 12: Regrets (Part 2)

Tris left me alone not soon after to go find Tobias and talk to him. Knowing him, he won't take it well. He'll make it seem fine but I know he won't be fine. He'll close himself off, especially from me.

I don't have to wait long for Eric to show up. He barges in through the doors, stomping his way over towards my bed before plopping down in the chair. He lets out a sigh before running a hand through the long section of hair that rests atop his head.

"How are you feeling?"

"We need to talk."

Eric tilts his head to the side, and even I can't deny that it's cute.

"Okay...? What about?"

"Us."

"What about us?"

"There can't be an 'us', Eric. I-I can't handle it."

He frowns, lines forming on his forehead as he furrows his eyebrows. I vaguely notice his knuckles tightening on the arm rest of the chair. "What do you mean?"

I take a deep breath. This isn't going to be easy. "What I mean is... I don't know what's going on with us right now. It's all just moving too fast, and it's overwhelming, and-"

"So we'll go slower."

"No. No," I tell him as I close my eyes and shake my head. I knew he would be like this. Time to bring out the big guns. I turn and face him, looking him directly in the eye. "All of this, all of... Us, it wasn't real. I didn't know what I was doing."

Now Eric looks hurt, and by god if it isn't killing me right now. "You can't possibly mean that."

"I do." Lie.

"So when you saved me at capture the flag... When you thanked me when I helped you..."

"I don't know what I was thinking. I was scared."

He stares at me, his eyes cold now. "You're scared of me?"

I swallow deeply, slowly nodding my head. He lets out a dark chuckle, shaking his head and looking away. The sad thing is that he looks more mad at himself than he does at me right now. "I should've known." He stands and punches the wall, obviously frustrated. I wince at his reaction, because I know what it's like to be where that wall is right now, and having Eric react like this is causing my anxiety levels to rise.

"Is there something else you're not telling me? Is Four even your real brother?" I go to answer but he just closes his eyes and shakes his head again. "Forget it. I don't even care." And with that he walks out of the room.

I stare at the doors, where he just left. I feel terrible. It's the second time I've lied to him, but this... This made me feel so much worse.

But it needed to be done.

"You know, you could've handled that a little differently sweetie."

The voice that appears to the left of me scares the bejeezus out of me. I jump, nearly falling off the bed in the process.

"Oh I'm sorry, honey. Did I scare you?" The nurse who stitched me up when Eric cut me with the knife asks, stepping out of the door that probably leads to the rest of the infirmary. "I'm just here to check up on you. And I may have heard what you said a little bit."

I purse my lips. "Just how much did you hear?"

The older woman taps her chin, pretending to think hard about her answer. "About all of it."

"Even the part with Tris?"

"Even the part with Tris."

I sigh, dropping my head against the wall. "Hey now! You're never going to leave here if you keep injuring yourself more."