Broken Love

Have I Ruined Everything?

Going over to the refreshment table, I grab another beer. I see Nathan standing there, just leaning on the wall, drinking whatever his choice of drink was. Liquid courage running through my veins, I walk up to him and kiss him like he has never been kissed before. His touch seems hesitant at first, but he relaxed and kissed me like I wanted him to kiss me.

I sighed against his lips as he breaks the kiss. I see confusion in his eyes for a brief second. "Follow me" he says. I try my best to walk. Instead, I end up staggering behind him, following him to an unknown location.

We stop when we find Jay. When he sees the two of us holding hands, his eyebrows arch on his forehead until they are hidden behind his curls. Nathan says something into Jay's ear, quiet enough that I couldn't hear him. Jay looks even more surprised at whatever it was Nathan was saying, then says "Upstairs, third door to the right!" as he points upstairs.

Nathan pulls my hand and drags me upstairs. I lock the door behind us and kiss him again until the both of us were breathless. He pushes me to the bed and undresses. The next thing I knew, my fantasies were coming true. Nathan made love to me like I belonged to him.

Twenty minutes later, we were finished and Nathan rolled off me. Guilt showed all over his face. "Nathan-" I said before he interrupted. He held up his hand, saying "Don't even say a word. We both are drunk. This shouldn't have happened." he walks out before you can say another word.

I tried to get up to stagger after him, but I got so dizzy that I fell back onto the bed that Nathan and I did the dirty deed on and passed out.

The Next Morning

I woke to the feeling of someone shaking me. I opened my eyes, sheilding them from the sun. When my eyes adjust, I find myself looking directly into Nathan's eyes. I see Tom, Jay, Siva, and Max standing behind him. "UGH! What's going on?" I ask, sitting up and holding my throbbing head. I could hear Max chuckle, but I ignore him, waiting for someone to answer me.

"We were worried sick about you, Alice! When you didn't come back downstairs last night, we thought you just fell asleep. But when you didn't come down this morning, we were concerned.!" Tom says. "What time is it?" I ask, still trying to nurse my hangover. "It's almost three o'clock!" Jay chimes in. I groan again. "Sorry to cause concern. Got any aspirin?" Nathan hands me two tablets and a glass of water. "Thanks" I say to him, seeing that he is unable to look me in the eye. I made a mental note to talk to him later.

"WAIT! DID YOU SAY 3PM?!" I shouted, totally forgetting about the appointment I had. "Yes...why?" Jay says, giving me a quizical look. "Because I have a doctor's appointment!" I responded.

Nathan shakes his head, saying "I'm pretty sure you can reschedule. You can't go to a doctor's appointment hung over. But I will take you home to rest it off." I sigh, knowing he was right, but I was dreading the awkward ride home.

"Fine." I said. I follow him to the car, trying my best not to throw up. My best wasn't enough. I lean against the car and empty the contents of my stomach on Jay's lawn. Nathan holds my hair as I throw up, saying "That's right. You will feel better when you're done."

Surprisingly, he was right. He helped me climb into the car and get my seat belt on. He climbed in next to me and starts the car. We drive home in an awkward silence, both of us thinking about last night.

I took a deep breath. "Nathan, I know you feel like we shouldn't have had sex last night, but I feel like it should have happened. Ever since I moved in, I have started to develop feelings for you." I said, finally bringing up the elephant in the room. He doesn't say a word until we pull up into the driveway.

Nathan shuts off the engine. "I really don't know how to say this without you being hurt. I just don't feel the same way about you. I'm sorry. I hope you understand." he says. I look him in the eyes, searching for just a glimmer of hope. None comes. I quickly turn away from him, feeling tears well up in my eyes.

"It's ok." I lie before opening the door to the car and climbing out. I run up the stairs and into the house, trying to hold back the tears. I slammed the door to the room Nathan leant me and locked it. I leaned against the door, finally letting the tears flow.

"ALICE!" I hear Nathan calling from outside the door. "Can we talk?" I ignore him, letting the tears speak for themselves. "OK, maybe later than. I am so sorry." he says before walking away.