Depressing Short Stories

Colors

I DIDN'T plan to sit down and write out what had actually happened between us but holding all of it in was unhealthy for me. Everyday, I found it hard to sleep with the memories playing out in my mind, both the good and bad ones.

There were many rumors flying around about what happened and they haunt my every time I take a step out from the comfort of my house. Without its protective walls around me, the judging eyes and ghostly whispers are free to attack me.

Even before I met you, there were always rumors about me as I'm a very closed up person. My life was a mess and everyone around me enjoyed trying to guess what went wrong. I used to be unaffected by them but then you came along and momentarily sheltered me from them, giving me the taste of what it was like to walk without noticing people's judgments of you.

You had the picture perfect life. Your younger brother is a well-respected man and your mother is a well-known television host; there was nothing wrong with your family in everyone's eyes. You were making money with every song you made.

But that was all that's to know about you. It wasn't easy for me to get close to you, to even be a friend to you to begin with, but I managed it. You once told me I was the only true friend you had and I felt special.

The hidden truths behind your perfect family you revealed to me. Your little brother had to work at a young age to make money to pay your hospital bills and his experience got him to where he is now. I remember you telling me that you never felt any love from your brother but I know that he loves you very much if he was willing to work to pay your bills.

On the other hand, your mother looks like she loves you with everything she has but she just shows it to keep her reputation up. Yes, she provided you with a house to stay and food to eat but she was the one who sent you away. She was the one who put you in a mental hospital while she smiled and chatted about nonsensical stuff on the television.

And you? You're only happy because your on drugs most of the time thanks to your mother. I guess that being sent to a mental hospital but not having any real mental problems does mess up your lives. You used to complain about having to take so many pills every single day but now I realised that as the days increased, your complains grew less.

At first, I didn't want to admit it. I didn't want to acknowledge the chances of you getting addicted to the drugs they supplied you with. But you did and that was your downfall, when you started to change and became someone I didn't know.

You were easily angered and had a temper like a lighted matchstick. Everything that came in contact with you was destroyed and demolished. You were like a walking destruction when it neared the time you normally took your medications.

The feeling of not being loved caused you to lash out your rage on others and you wanted them to feel the same way you did. I tried so, so hard to tell you that doing so doesn't change anything as they weren't the ones who made you feel that way but you turned on me too.

But I can't deny the times where I found you huddled up in a corner with your head nested within your arms. When I called your name, you would look up with your eyes welled with tears and your face red from crying.

Those times that you came knocking on my door at 3am in the morning because you couldn't sleep as your mother was home with someone else. The nights you ranted to me about all the imperfections in your life and fell asleep on my bed 15 minutes later. The way your eyes held a tint of sadness in them and the sides of your lips naturally curled downwards in a small frown.

Everyday, there was something bound to happen to you and there was never a day you didn't come to me to update me on what's new in your life. Although it was an honour to be the first person you go to each time something happens, there were times I wished you would shut up because I had a bad day too.